Page 148 of From Nowhere

Maren: What are you doing?

Ozzy: I’m outside your window, trying not to fall off the ladder

Seconds later, Maren opens the blinds, eyes wide. “What are you doing?” she says, sliding up the window with her good arm.

“Sneaking around,” I mumble over the dandelions while climbing into her bedroom.

Something between satisfaction and pride swells in my chest when I notice her wearing my T-shirt.

“My parents are across the hallway.” She nods toward her door and suppresses a giggle while I hand her the flowers.

“I figured. That’s why I said I’msneakingaround.”

Her hair is messy and damp, as if she showered before bed. She sets the flowers on the nightstand and turns. “What are you doing?” she asks while I slide my finger along my phone’s screen.

“Setting an alarm for four in the morning, so I’m out of here before your parents wake up, and I can get home before anyone at my house wakes.”

Her smile doubles. “You’re here to spend the night with me?”

I shrug off my T-shirt and remove my shorts. “I am.” I gesture toward the bed with my chin.

Maren eases into bed, reclining onto the pillows stacked for her injured collarbone. She winces a bit, and I know it’s her broken ribs.

“Close your eyes,” I say, lying on my side next to her.

She narrows them. “Why?”

“Because I want to say some things, and it won’t go well if you’re looking at me.”

Her gaze sweeps across my face before she turns toward the ceiling, closes her eyes, and whispers, “Okay.”

I rest my hand low on her stomach, fingers splayed across her soft flesh. And I relish the feel of her warm body and the floral scent of her hair. “I prepared myself to lose you,” I say. “To grieve you. To help Lola deal with another awful blow.”

Maren rests her hand over mine, squeezing it.

“But you didn’t die. And those feelings didn’t vanish when you came out of your coma. Even if your death wasn’t real, my feelings over losing you were. So I’ve needed to mourn your near death for my heart to reconcile all of those emotions and recalibrate to the reality that you’re still alive and hopefully not dying anytime soon. I’ve had to find a way to navigate my feelings about love and loss while somehow leading Lola through another tragedy, even if the outcome has been different. Everything about Brynn’s death came rushing back when I heard your plane went down. So my feelings have been ...”

“Messy,” she whispers.

“Yeah.” I lift onto my elbow and kiss the corner of her mouth. “And now, the only messy feeling I have is regret about my messy feelings because tonight, I had a long talk with Lola aboutgrown-uplove. And in the middle of my speech, I knew it wasn’t for her. It was for me. Andfor the past two weeks, I’ve let fear dictate how I love you. And I don’t ever want to do that again.”

Silence settles between us, and a few tears stain her cheeks. “If you asked me to stop flying, I would,” she whispers. “I’d do it to be with you and Lola because I don’t think I’ll look back on the most memorable moments in life and see the sky. I think I’ll see you and Lola.”

Well, fuck. I’m not going to get emotional, even if she’s bringing me to my proverbial knees. However, I need a few seconds to catch my breath. “I would never ask you to stop flying.”

She slides her fingers between mine. “I know,” she whispers. “But you need to know that I would.”

With Maren in my life, it never feels like the right time to think of Brynn. But right now, I hope she knows that I’ve found someone special. Someone who loves our daughter.

Maren’s body relaxes as she falls asleep beside me. And I blink, releasing the tears I’ve held since she arrived home from Canada. I still don’t know how everything will work out, but I have to believe it will.

It has to.

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Maren

Good morning.

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