Page 49 of A Good Book

Maybe it was the emotional exhaustion of Ben’s illness or the glimpse of Matt’s vulnerability and true feelings for Julianne, but for whatever reason, I decided to share my secret. “I’ve had a crush on you since before you and Sarah were dating.”

Matt grinned like he wasn’t the least bit surprised by my confession. “I’m flattered.”

Flattered? I wasn’t trying to flatter him. His response made me feel like a child. How cute or sweet it was for me to have a crush on him?

“Well, that’s good. That’s what I was going for.”

Matt’s eyebrows lifted a fraction. I wasn’t as well-versed in sarcasm. That was my sister Eve’s area of expertise. But it just came out.

“You’re Sarah’s sister. It’s a little weird.”

“Sarah’s with your brother.That’swhat’s weird.”

Matt pressed his lips together and nodded slowly.

“Ugh!” I covered my face, rubbing my forehead with the pads of my fingers. “I’m stressed. And confused. And tired. Please forget I said anything. I sound desperate. I’m not desperate. I mean, clearly I’m a little desperate, but—gah! Shut up, Gabriella!” I jumped up, hitting my head on the wood rail of the top bunk. “Ouch!” I seethed.

“Oh, shit!” Matt stood. “Are you okay?” He moved my hand out of the way to look at my head. “Luckily it’s not bleeding, but you’re going to have a nice goose egg.” He kissed my head.

“I’m a mess, embarrassed, sad, tired, and all around miserable. You should go. Run. Don’t turn back.”

“Well, I’m sad, angry, unfocused, making poor decisions, and all around miserable too.”

I looked up at him.

Matt smiled, brushing my hair away from my face. “Sarah’s with my brother,” he whispered as if he were thinking out loud instead of speaking to me. “So what if I kiss her sister, right?” The pad of his thumb brushed along my cheek. “So what if we make poor decisions together?”

I swallowed hard. “Such as?”

His gaze homed in on my mouth, and he wet his lips. “Such as doing something that feels really good so we can have a break from feeling so bad.” He lowered his head just enough to brush his lips along mine.

“Yeah,” I whispered.

Teasing turned into kissing. It was nice, better than the time I thought he was going to kiss me so I turned my head, but not as good as it felt when Ben kissed me. But I just hit my head, and I was sad about Ben, so could I expect it to be a mind-blowing kiss with so much on my mind?

Still, it was nice. Matt was far better than the back of my hand. Yet, I couldn't stop wondering what Ben was doing? Was he feeling better? I couldn’t imagine him going and me staying in Michigan.

Matt dropped his hands from my face to my waist and kissed me deeper. It was still nice, but not Ben. So I continued to think of Ben because it helped my lips move in sync with Matt’s.

Then his hands slid between us, and he unbuttoned my jeans.

I went into full panic mode, my body going rigid.

Matt paused. “Is this okay?” He kissed along my cheek to my neck.

I gripped his shirt, heart thrashing against my chest.

“Please say it’s okay. I want to just fucking forget the world. Don’t you?” He unzipped my jeans.

What was happening? Weren’t we supposed to make out? Kissing and maybe a subtle graze of his hand along my breast on the outside of my shirt? Then I would giggle and playfully scold him because I wasn’t having sex before marriage.

“Are you wet for me, Gabby?” His fingers teased the waistband of my underwear.

I grabbed his wrist to stop him, and he pulled back an inch, squinting.

I returned a nervous smile. “Um …”

“You’re not a virgin, right? You had a condom in your bra at my party.”

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