Page 37 of Enzo

“No shit, Sherlock. I saw the ID hanging round his neck...” Enzo’s voice dropped slightly, almost as if he didn’t want to say the next part. “Robbie knows he’s a journalist and it’s freaked him the fuck out.”

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing my breathing to stay steady. I clutched my book. He wasn’t wrong. When I realized Gray was a journalist, it felt like someone had yanked the ground out from beneath me. My chest had gotten so tight that I thought I might pass out.

“Shit, was that another trigger?” Logan asked, his voice quieter now. “Hell, is the kid okay?”

I’m not a kid, I thought, biting my tongue to stop the words from slipping out. But I knew they were worried. Still, hearing Logan call me that stung.

“First, he’s not a kid; he’s twenty-three.” My heart skipped when Enzo corrected Logan. “Second, you remember that filing he did last week after he spilled that coffee, and he had a meltdown over whether we were going to throw him out?” Enzo’s voice softened a fraction.

“Yeah.” Logan sighed.

“He’s refiling it.”

My heart sank further. They knew. Of course, they knew. I wasn’t fooling anyone. I hated that I couldn’t hide my anxiety when it took over like that.

“Fuck,” Logan muttered. “I didn’t mean to throw Robbie under the bus, but…”

“You shouldn’t have asked Robbie to talk to that guy. You know how he can’t handle the?—”

“I’m sorry, okay, I wasn’t thinking. Robbie asked me to challenge him with new stuff,” Logan defended.

I bit my lip hard enough to taste blood. He was right. I wanted to be better, to be stronger. But this… this had been too much.Fuck!

“He meant asking him to get a coffee order or something maybe, not go toe to toe with a goddamned journalist. In our safe place? Jesus, Lo.”

They aren’t mad at me. They’re angry at themselves. They care.

I swallowed. This was a safe place. I blinked hard, struggling with the lump in my throat.

When I heard Logan’s footsteps, then the knock on my door, I wiped my eyes with my shirt sleeve.

“Hang on!” I called, my voice still shaky.

I tried to make everything look normal. Neat piles, my black book tucked away, but I knew Logan wouldn’t be fooled. When I opened the door, he didn’t push his way in but stood there, gaze soft but still searching.

“Hey,” I said, forcing a smile.

“I fucked up,” he said. “I apologize.”

“No, I’m sorry that I couldn’t…” My throat tightened again. I set the files down before they slipped from my shaking hands. “Enzo must think I’m such a mess.” Why did I default to what Enzo thought of me?

Because Enzo is all I can think about.

Logan sighed, regretful. “Not at all. He’s pissed at me for being an idiot. In my defense, it’s been a bad day.”

I almost smiled, but the anxiety still sat heavy in my chest.

“I asked you to push me out of my comfort zone, and I want you to do it again,” I said. “I won’t mess up next time.”

“It’s all good,” Logan said. “This is a safe place, and I don’t know your whole story, but I shouldn’t put my shit first. You’re worth more than me messing you up. Okay?”

“Okay.” My voice was small, but I tried to sound more assertive. “Okay,” I said again, firmer this time.

“I’ll leave you to it.”

“Please… don’t give up on me, okay?” I asked before he could leave, my voice a whisper.

“Never, kid. Never.”