Page 113 of Finding Us

She laughs. “Because it’s not always great. You’re still in the honeymoon phase. You and Garret, like every other couple, will have ups and downs over the years. Arguments. Disagreements. But that’s what keeps a marriage interesting. You’re not always going to agree on things.”

“Did you ever argue with—” I glance down. “I’m sorry.”

“Jade, you can talk about him. In fact, I’dlikeyou to talk about him. It makes me feel like he’s still with us, watching over us from up there somewhere.” She points at the sky.

“That’s where I pictured him, too.” I say it softly as I remember the image in my head.

“What did you say, honey?”

“After I found out what happened, I pictured Arlin up in the clouds. He was sailing. And he met my mom.” Saying it brings up all the emotion of that day and before I can stop them, tears run down my cheeks. “He took my mom sailing.”

Grace notices the tears and gets up from her chair, holding her hand out. “Come here, honey.”

I stand up and she pulls me into a hug.

“I miss him, Grace. I miss talking to him. I miss hearing his jokes. I miss sailing with him. I needed more time with him. I finally had a grandfather and then—”

“I know.” She says it quietly behind my shoulder, still hugging me.

“I never got to tell Arlin this, but I’m telling you.” I pull away and she takes a tissue from the pocket of her sweater and hands it me. “I’m really happy you and Arlin came into my life. At first I was afraid to meet you, but after I did I knew I wanted to spend more time with you. With both of you. I just wasn’t sure if I should because I felt like I was betraying my mom somehow. Like I shouldn’t even talk to you knowing what Royce did to her.” I wipe the tears off my face. “Sorry. I shouldn’t bring that up. I just wanted to tell you that I really like having you in my life.”

She holds my hand and we both sit back down in the chairs. “I wish I’d met you sooner, Jade. I wish I could’ve done something all those years ago. Helped your mother. Saved you from all the pain you had to endure when you were a child. I feel so much guilt for that. If only I had seen Royce for the man he’d become, maybe I would’ve known what he was capable of. Maybe I could’ve stopped him somehow.”

“It’s not your fault. Don’t feel guilty about it. I don’t blame you or Arlin for anything Royce did.”

She nods, taking another tissue from her sweater to use for her own tears.

Now I made her cry. That’s just great. Like she’s not already sad enough. I guess this is my chance to say something to her about it.

“Grace. Are you okay? I mean, are you okay living on your own? Without Arlin? Because I feel like you’re not and I don’t know what to do for you.”

She smiles, but tears are still falling from her eyes. “It just takes time. When you’re with someone for that long, it just takes time to move on. And I’m not quite there yet.”

“Can I do something? I could stay here with you. Garret can go home and pick me up later. I could stay here until you leave to go back to the Hamptons.”

“That’s sweet of you, Jade, but you need to be with your new husband. And I’m only here for a few more days. I’m flying to Virginia on Wednesday and spending time with the girls, your sisters. Victoria called last week and asked if I’d come for a visit.”

“Well, that’s good, right? You said you don’t get to spend enough time with them.”

“Yes, it’s good, although I think I’m invited more as a babysitter than a guest. Victoria’s mother is ill so she’s going to stay with her in New York. She’s put me in charge of the girls while she’s gone. But they’re old enough now that they don’t need their grandmother watching over them. In fact they’ll probably be out with their friends. I doubt I’ll see them much.” Grace dabs her tears. “Look at us crying on this beautiful day. We shouldn’t be crying. We should be celebrating. You’re newly married. You’ll be starting a new school soon. And you’re happy, Jade, which is something to celebrate.”

“You’re right.” I stand up and take a deep breath. “Let’s do something. You want to take a walk?”

“Yes, that’s a good idea. There’s a park just a few blocks from here that has a rose garden. I think you’d like it.”

“Sounds perfect.”

We walk through the neighborhood to the park and she shows me the rose garden. Next to the park is a shopping area and a small cafe where we have lunch. Then we go through some of the stores. We don’t get back until 4 and when we get there, Garret’s pulling into the driveway.

“Where have you two been?” he asks as he gets out of the car.

I walk over and kiss his cheek. “We went to the park, had lunch, and did some shopping.”

Grace comes over to him. “You missed a good time, Garret.”

“Sounds like it.” He smiles at me.

“You two relax,” Grace says. “I’m going to clean up and take a short nap before dinner. I thought I’d take you to a little Italian restaurant I enjoy. It’s just a few miles from here. Shall we leave at 6?”

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