Page 138 of Finding Us

“A couple hours?” Garret appears in front of me. “You’ve been gone for almost four hours, Jade. Four fucking hours! And you didn’t bring your phone!”

I check the clock on the microwave. Shit, he’s right. Ihavebeen gone that long.

“Sorry. I fell asleep on the beach. I must’ve slept longer than I thought.” I refill my glass with more water. I’m still kind of pissed at Garret for his earlier behavior so I don’t really care that he had to sit here wondering where I was.

Garret takes the glass from me and sets it on the counter. He turns me toward him, his hands on my shoulders. “Jade, I don’t think you understand. I was freaking out here. I almost called the cops.”

“You’re overreacting. I was just running.”

“Yes, and if we were a normal couple who didn’t have to worry about shit, then maybe I wouldn’t be so upset right now. But that’s not us. So I can’t have you run off like that and not tell me you’ll be gone for four hours.”

“We’re not normal?” I reach around for my glass and drink some more water. “What does that mean?”

“You know what it means.”

“No, I really don’t. I need to sit down. My legs are killing me.” I bring my water and take a seat at the kitchen table, putting my feet up on the other chair.

Garret picks my feet up, placing them across his lap as he sits down. “You know we have to be careful.”

“Why? You keep telling me it’s over. Are you saying it’s not?”

“It’s over. But I still worry. I don’t want them to try and—”

I set my glass down. “Try what? What would they try?”

He shakes his head. “I don’t know. I’m just paranoid, I guess.”

“You told me you weren’t worried about it anymore. The week of our wedding you told me to never think about the organization ever again. You said we shouldn’t let them scare us or mess with our heads.”

“I know, and I’m not doing that. I just—” He looks down, rubbing his forehead. “I just worry about you.”

“Why?” I take my feet off his lap and set them on the floor. “What are you not telling me? Did they threaten to hurt me?”

He looks at me again. “No. That’s not it.”

“Then what is it?”

He’s quiet and it’s scaring me. I’m so sick of the organization and I’m tired of Garret not being able to tell me anything about them.

“Tell me, Garret. You’re not keeping secrets from me. Just tell me why you’re so worried about me.”

He stands up, running his hands through his hair. “Because I love you, okay? That’s why I’m worried. Because I don’t want anything to happen to you. So you can’t just fucking disappear for hours at a time without your phone.”

“Why else are you worried?”

“Isn’t that enough of a reason?”

“There’s something else. I can tell. You think they’ll come after me. You think they’ll do something to me to get back at you for not going along with their plan.”

He walks in the kitchen and leans back against the counter, staring down at the floor.

“Garret. Is that true?”

He sighs. “Yes.”

I get up and go stand in front of him. “Why? What happened? Did your dad tell you something? Are they planning something?”

Garret shakes his head and pulls me into him. “No. I just—” He sighs again. “I can’t stop thinking about it. I know my dad said this is just what they wanted. To make me live in fear, always wondering, always thinking they’ll come back. And I know I said I wouldn’t, but I can’t help it. I think about it, Jade. I think about it all the time. I don’t give a shit what they do to me, but I won’t let them do anything to you. I can’t. It’s my job to protect you and I feel like I can’t do a good enough job. I can’t be with you 24/7. I can’t always be there to make sure nothing happens.”

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