Page 139 of Finding Us

I look up at him. “You don’t have to be. I’m fine. Nothing will happen to me. I can take care of myself. I did before I met you and I can now.”

“Before you met me you weren’t involved in this. Now you are.”

“You said it was over. So why do you keep acting like it’s not?”

“I know it’s over. I know I should stop worrying. But I don’t trust them, Jade. They waited 12 years to go after my mom. Twelve fucking years. They waited until my dad was married and had a kid and 12 years had passed. He thought she was safe. And then they killed her.”

He holds me closer, taking deep breaths.

“How long have you been worried about this?” My cheek’s against his chest and I can hear his heart beating really fast.

“Since we got married. Actually, before that. Since Roth showed up at the restaurant that day.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because this ismything, Jade, not yours. I’m letting them fuck with my head and I need to get over it. And I’m trying to. I really am. But I haven’t been able to yet.”

“Garret.” I speak softly. “They did that to your mom because your dad is a member. You’re not. You never will be. They’re not coming back for you. Your dad asked Roth and he admitted he only showed up at the restaurant to scare us.”

“I know all that. But I also know what they’re capable of. I know the type of people they are. And I don’t trust them.”

I pull back and look at him. “What are you saying? You really think they’d do something?”

“I think I just need more time to accept the fact that they won’t. The whole thing is still too fresh in my mind. Maybe now that we’re married and living in this town I’ll get over it and accept that they’re not coming back and that this really is over.” He lifts my chin up and our eyes meet. “But until then, would you please not run off like that without your phone? And without telling me how long you’ll be gone?”

“Yes. Sorry. I didn’t mean to be out that long.”

His eyes remain on mine, his face serious. “I love you. So much. I don’t know what I’d do if anything ever happened to you.”

“Nothing will happen.” I pull back but his arms remain around my waist. “Garret, I need to shower. I stink. I can’t believe you’re able to be this close to me without gagging.”

“You’re sweaty, but it’s not that bad.” He gives me a kiss.

“Could you help me? I’m really tired after running for that long. I can barely stand up.”

“Can I help you shower?” He smiles. “Yeah, I could do that.”

He follows me to the bathroom.

“You know what?” I ask as he turns the shower on.

“What?” He peels the clothes off my sweaty body.

“I think we just had a fight.”

“It wasn’t a fight. It was a disagreement followed by a discussion.”

“It was a fight.” I undo his belt and shorts and let them fall to the floor.

He’s still smiling. “Okay, I guess it was a fight.”

“Which means we need to have makeup sex.Showermakeup sex.”

“I don’t think we’ve done that before.” He strips off his remaining clothes and follows me into the shower. He grabs my hips and hauls me into him. Then he lifts me up and against the wall and puts his wet mouth over mine, his tongue pushing past my lips. Whenever we have sex after he’s angry, he’s more forceful and aggressive in the way he touches me and kisses me, like he is right now.

He pushes inside me and I gasp.

“Too rough?” he asks, his eyes aimed directly at mine.

---