Page 78 of Finding Us

“What’s wrong, Jade?” Grace wakes me from my thoughts.

“I was just thinking that it would’ve been nice to have my mom here.”

Her smile fades and I realize I shouldn’t have said that to her since her son is the reason my mom is no longer alive.

“Grace, I didn’t mean—”

“You’re right.” She nods, her eyes on our joined hands. “A mother should see her daughter get married. I’m sorry he took that from you. From both of you.”

“No, I didn’t mean it that way. I just—” I stop and Grace looks at me. “Actually, Grace, you’ve been more of a mom to me than my own mom ever was. You take care of me and listen to me and worry about me. So in a way, I kind of do have a mom here today.”

She smiles, her eyes wet. She takes a tissue to blot her tears.

I take one, too. “We’re going through a lot of these today.”

“That seems to happen at weddings.” She hugs me, then stands back, smiling at me again. “I’ll see you after the ceremony.”

She leaves, and I look at myself one last time, then go downstairs. Frank is waiting in the living room. He stands up when he sees me. His lips quiver and his face gets all red.

“Oh, honey.” He smiles as a tear goes down his face. “You look beautiful. And so grown up. I don’t know if I can give you away yet. I’m not ready to.”

His voice is shaky and I feel tears forming again as I meet him at the bottom of the stairs. “Don’t make me cry, Frank.”

“I just never expected this to happen so soon. But sometimes the right person just walks into your life when you least expect it. And for you that happened to be on your first night at college. Who would’ve thought?”

“Yeah. I know.”

“Well, I suppose we should get out there.” He turns to leave.

“Wait.” I pause as he turns back around. “Before we go, I just need to say thank you. For everything you’ve ever done for me.” I reach over and hug him. “I love you, Dad.”

I feel him tremble as he hugs me back. “If you didn’t want me to cry, then you shouldn’t have said that.” He pulls away, tears running down his cheeks. But he’s smiling wider than I’ve ever seen him smile.

“You’re the only dad I’ve ever known and even though I’m not technically your kid, if it’s okay, I want to call you that. I want my dad to walk me down the aisle.”

“Nothing would make me happier.” He hugs me again. “I love you, honey. Now let’s get this thing started.”

We each grab a tissue and wipe our eyes, then I pick up my pink rose bouquet and we head outside. Frank takes my arm as we walk onto the beach.

White chairs sit on each side of a narrow piece of white fabric and at the end of it is a trellis covered with bright pink and white flowers. And standing just in front of it is Garret, looking more handsome than I’ve ever seen him, in his black tuxedo and crisp white shirt.

Seeing him there, I’m overwhelmed with love, excitement, anticipation, and so much happiness I feel like I can’t contain it. I can’t believe he’s mine and that I get to spend the rest of my life with him.

We’re still far away from each other but I can see Garret smiling, his eyes not leaving me for even a second. The violinist that Harper hired starts playing the processional music and I realize that this is it. It’s time.

I watch as Sean and Harper walk down the aisle. Lilly follows, looking so tiny and adorable, tossing pink rose petals from her little white basket. She’s skipping, which is not what we practiced but the skipping is even cuter than the walking.

Now it’s my turn and I glance at everyone standing there, their eyes focused on me as Frank leads me down the aisle. There are only a few chairs and two rows since it’s such a small wedding. Grace and Harper’s parents are in the second row. Ryan is in the first row and Pearce is across the aisle from him, along with Lilly. She’s so excited she’s bouncing on her toes. Pearce is holding her hand, trying to keep her still.

I look up and see Garret. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look at me this way. I’m not sure how to describe it other than to say that I feel how he looks, filled with pure joy and happiness.

When we finally reach the end of the aisle, Frank hands me over to Garret. My heart was beating really fast, but as soon as Garret takes my hand, I relax.

He leans down to my ear. “You look so incredibly beautiful.” He smiles as he stands up straight again.

We turn to face Andrew. He begins talking, giving a little speech about marriage and love. I’m kind of listening, but not really. I’m too lost in the moment, trying to capture each detail so I’ll remember this forever. The roaring ocean, the cool salty air, the warm sun, the sweet smell of the fresh flowers lining the trellis. The setting is more perfect than I could’ve ever imagined.

Garret keeps glancing my way, watching me, smiling. I look at him, too, and when I do it makes my heart get all fluttery.