Page 39 of Of Skulls Of Shackles

Part of me reveled in that because that is how he made me feel. “You have so little faith in me, See.”

“Never in you, my darkness. Just in the world and every other creature within, including myself, for you must react to our failings and foolishness for eternity. That is what I fear. That is where one thousand unpredictabilities and hardships in our destiny will arise from.”

I spun to gaze up at him. “A wonder you have not turned to ruin with those cynical views.”

He was greatly affected by my nearness, as was I by his.

See’s chest rose. “There is no wonder in the cynical heart of a king, for there is a good reason your fate is not mine. Her pure heart sees our best, and there is the source of her power, and so she drives the fate of all to vibrancy again.”

Very suddenly, the enormity of what I chased by conquering kings hit me.

I was meant to save or ruin the world.

I was meant to save monsters.

Everyone.

What if I failed? Where would I begin?

I gripped See’s arms as my knees buckled, and my eyes widened with every impossible task that crashed through my mind.Millionsof them. “How am I meant to do it all?” I gasped, then screamed the rest, “How do I begin?”

“Stop looking, Perantiqua.” See’s voice came from far away.

He shook me a little, then gripped my chin, staring into my eyes, our noses nearly touching.

I became lost in milkiness. He was speaking, but I could not hear him.

I focused on his thin lips.

Still so difficult to hear.

“Stop looking so far ahead,” he said from a great distance. “Your mind is not meant to fathom the unfathomable. Come back to the last questions you felt brave to ask, dark beauty. Come back there.”

I could not think of any brave questions, only ones filled with fear. The floor of pretense had fallen away in my mind, and I was hurtling down into the icy depths of future responsibilities I had no idea how to see through or begin. Here I was setting to war againstkings.Five kings had not sealed the fate of the world, and how arrogant to believe that one queen might succeed.

I—somehow—was meant to control the saving fate of the world.

“Stop falling, my darkness. I have you here,” See said softly. He squeezed my arms gently.Stroking.“I have you, Perantiqua.”

A crazed laugh slipped from me, but I clamped my lips as firmly together as possible, then forced my mind to the sensation of his touch and his soft murmurs. I focused on making out each of his words, and on how large his fingers and hands felt on my arms. He was telling me to close my mind to a future so distant that it could not be fathomed, even by ancient queens. He was telling me to return to the realm of which I had some control over.

My queendom. My monsters. My obsession.

Me.

Him.

Drawing a long breath, I released the breath in a rush, and was able to shut off the dangerous overwhelm that I had entered.

I hoarsely repeated the last question I had felt truly brave to ask. “Do you believe in what I was created for?”

“I do. I believe it in absoluteness.”

Belief.Who could have expected what force that sentiment might hold.

I thudded my forehead against See’s chest. I could not look ahead to everything that must be done. If I did, the impossible feeling of my fate would drown me. Yet at the beginning of my monsterdom, I could not have seen myself here inthismoment with such power and knowledge. I must open myself to the whims of ancients and trust in the unfolding of my path. So, what was next?

I needed the fifth rhyme and reason. Some keys. That was all.That, I could fathom without drowning.

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