Page 692 of The Tempted

“My girls…” I whisper.

“Need their mother,” she replies.

“Don’t you think I know that?” I seethe. “Don’t you think I know this will break their hearts? Why do you think I haven’t told them yet? I don’t even know where to begin, I’m so angry. I’m so mad at him. I feel guilty for being angry because he didn’t ask to be sick but like everything else, I’m the one left here to deal with it. I’m the one who has to tell our daughters their father has a few months to live. I’m the one who has to tell them he’s being transferred to a prison down south so he can follow through with some sick vendetta. I’m so angry that he’s being transferred, robbing us of the visits we can have before he dies.”

“He’s doing it on purpose, Grace. It’s not only about the promise he made that biker and his club but it’s because he doesn’t want you and his girls to see him deteriorate. He wants you to remember him the way he’s always been.”

“What about what I want? What about what the girls want? We never had a say in much but we’re the ones who will suffer when he leaves this world. —We should have a say! I vowed to love him through sickness and health and I thought when the time came that one of us became sick we would be there for one another. I’ve been robbed of my vows. I should be there taking care of him. I should be holding his hand when he takes his final breath! I should be able to say goodbye…”

I take a deep breath, trying to compose myself as I stand, bracing my hands on the counter and bow my head.

“How am I going to live without him?” I sob.

“You already are,” Gina replies.

“It’s not the same,” I argue. “How am I going to live the rest of my life, never being able to hear him call me Gracie, never being able to look him in the eye and see our whole life reflected in those eyes?” I shake my head before glancing over my shoulder and staring at Gina.

“How am I going to tell our girls their father is dying? How am I going to be strong enough for them?”

“I’ll help you, Bert will help too and so will Ma. You’re not alone, Grace. We’re crazy and maybe a little eccentric but we’re family and we all love Adrianna and Nikki…” she pauses, “We love you too, Grace.”

I spin around, dropping my hands to my sides and lean my back against the counter.

“I have to tell the girls,” I say finally.

As a parent we try our best to shelter our children, even when they become adults, we can’t help ourselves and still we try to protect them. I can’t protect, I can’t shield my daughters from losing their father but I will be their rock, their strength when they’re too weak with grief.

And when their hearts start to mend, then and only then will I grieve.

Alone I will mourn my love, my life. My Victor.

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