Page 44 of Raging Inferno

Taking Christopher’s hand, Bea looks to Jimmy for answers. Keeping his eyes on me, he speaks quietly to her.

“She didn’t know,” he explains, confirming that he, in fact, did know.

He knew who I was.

He knew who Chris was.

He knew and never thought to tell me.

The realization makes me weak in the knees and I grip the railing to keep me upright as Bea ushers Christopher into the house. Once the door closes behind them, Jimmy steps in front of me. Face to face I stare into his eyes and a million questions race through my mind.

His lies burn between us, ruining everything.

Destroying us.

“How could you do this to me?” I whisper.

“I’m sorry—”

“Did you know all along? From the beginning did you know who I was? Who he was?”

“No — “I don’t believe you,” I shriek, tears falling from my eyes.

“I didn’t know until I brought you home on our first date. I was walking out the door, and I saw the picture of the two of you.”

“That was the fucking beginning!”

Anger boils in my veins and I place my hands on his hard chest, shoving him backward. He doesn’t budge and so I ball my fists around the fabric of the shirt.

“What did you get out of it? Huh? Did misleading me and getting me to trust you—did it scratch an itch for you? Does fucking the widows of the people you couldn’t save get you off, Jimmy? Is that what gets your dick wet?” I shout between sobs.

“I did fucking save him,” he hollers back. “He didn’t die on my watch!”

For some reason hearing him say those words brings me back to my wedding day, to the point in time when I stood before the altar and turned around only to be told my groom wasn’t coming.

I’m sorry, Ms. Moscato.

We did everything we could.

He died on impact.

“Look, I thought he had left you at the altar. I didn’t know he died until you told me, yourself and honestly, after that, I didn’t think it mattered.”

“Oh, so you thought he didn’t matter? I have a son who will prove otherwise,” I sneer.

“You’re twisting my words. That isn’t what I meant,” he hisses. “If you would just calm down, then I could explain—”

“I don’t want your explanations. What I want is for you to leave.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“With every fiber of my being,” I rectify. “If I never saw you another day in my life, it would be too soon.”

Like his lies, my words cut him deep and his face falls. I feel a temporary burst of satisfaction before my own pain rears its ugly head, and it forces my eyes away from him.

“I love you,” he says, hoarsely. “I fucking love you with every fiber of my being. I’ll give you a few days to cool off and collect your thoughts but then I’m coming back to you. We’re going to talk it out.”

“It’s over Jimmy,” I say with conviction in my tone. I hold his gaze for a moment before stepping around him. Needing to be alone with my thoughts, I start for the front door.

“No, it’s not and if you think I’m giving up, then you don’t know me at all,” he calls out as I step inside. Without replying, I slam the door shut and lean against it. The tears fall freely as I’m foolishly reminded that timing is everything.

And, my time with Jimmy is over.

Sometimes the best laid plans are actually the worst mistakes of all.

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