Page 82 of Cocky Jerk

I guess that’s my answer.

“Come on, I’ll take you home,” she says.

There’s no fight left in me and so I let her lead me away from the precinct, but it feels like I’m leaving a piece of me behind.

It’s okay.

Who needs a treacherous heart, anyway?

Chapter Twenty-Five

Antonia

Ionce heard someone sayif you follow a spiral inward, it never ends. It will just keep tightening infinitely. I think that’s what happened; I followed the spiral and there’s no magic lever to release the pressure. I can’t claw my way to the top or reverse the damage.

After my mother drove me home, I passed out on the couch. I don’t know if she stayed with me, but by the time I woke up; she was gone. I was glad because I wasn’t in the mood or the frame of mind to deal with anyone.

That didn’t stop the phone from ringing, though, or the infinite text messages from Marco, which I ignored. I think the only reason I didn’t bury my phone in the backyard was that I was still holding out for a miracle. Still hoping my dad would call me and tell me to pick him up, that the charges were dropped, and he was a free man.

But that didn’t happen.

Soraya called and left a message. She left several messages actually and at first, they were work related.

Hey, I’m just calling to check in. I hope you were able to take care of that family emergency.

An hour later…

You’re later than usual, is everything okay?

Twenty minutes after that.

Ok, I guess you’re not coming in today. Can you at least give me a call and let me know if you’re okay? You left really abruptly yesterday.

Five minutes later…

I just got off the phone with Marco. Call me.

The last message she sent was a response to the anonymous submission I had sent to her last week. I couldn’t bring myself to read it. Just knowing that she knew it was me who had sent it was enough to send me over the edge. I grabbed whatever I could find in my dad’s liquor cabinet and started drinking.

It was five o’clock somewhere and if it wasn’t, I didn’t care. When your life falls to shit, there isn’t a manual to follow. Etiquette isn’t a concern. You just roll with the punches and hope you survive the day.

When it did actually become five o’clock, my phone dinged with a calendar alert. I had forgotten all about my scheduled appointment with Tig. Instead of dismissing the alert like I should have, I pulled open my rideshare app. I was too drunk to drive, but I decided I wasn’t going to miss the appointment. A tattoo was the furthest thing from my mind. I just wanted to know if everything was a lie. Did Tig really want to meet me or was he part of the plan too? In my drunken stupor, I even wondered if Marco lied about Tig and Delia’s infertility issues. It didn’t seem that much of a stretch when I had already convinced myself the only reason Soraya hired me in the first place was to assist Marco in his agenda to take down my dad.

My ride arrived in ten minutes and now, a half hour later, I’m standing outside Tig’s shop in the rain, holding an empty bottle of Jack Daniels, wondering how the fuck I let any of this happen. I’m about to turn around and leave when Tig’s eyes meet mine through the glass window. He rises from his stool and makes his way toward the door. Opening it, he steps outside and pulls the hood of his sweatshirt over his head.

“I didn’t think you were going to show,” he says over the rain.

I blink the rain away from my eyelashes and swallow. Coming here was another mistake.

“I’m sorry…” I stammer, glancing down at the empty bottle in my hand. Tears well in my eyes and I feel myself start to break. Tig takes the bottle from my hand and lifts my chin with his finger.

“Come inside,” he says.

I know I shouldn’t, but I let him lead me into the shop. He nods for me to take a seat at his station and shrugs his hoodie from his shoulders. Draping it over the front desk, he chucks the bottle of Jack and reaches under the desk to open a cabinet, pulling out a bottle of Patron. I watch him walk to the door and flick the sign that reads ’we’re open’ to ‘we’re closed’.

My mind flashes back to the night Marco shared Tigs story with me and how he said they were hurting financially from all the fertility treatments. He made me understand that Tig and Delia didn’t miss a day of work, nor did they close their shop for no good reason. Yet, there’s no sign of Delia, and Tig just closed his doors.

Lies.

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