Page 151 of Blackout-

Still stuck on psych evaluation, I cut him off.

“Wait, back up. They admitted her for a psych evaluation,” I repeat back, looking at Sunny for some sort of clarity, knowing she can’t give it to me.

“Yeah, she’s in the psych ward, Black,” he elaborates, his voice cracking as he says my name. “All these years, we thought it would be me,” he rasps. “Instead, it’s my daughter. I should’ve realized she was struggling.”

“Lacey wasn’t going to let anyone in on that, Jack, because of the baby,” I tell him. “She was determined to stay off her meds.”

“Well, as I said, Spiegel is bringing in her OBGYN to consult on treatment. With you being where you are, I’m her proxy. I don’t think it has to be said, but in case you need to hear it anyway, I won’t make any decisions that aren’t in both Lacey and the baby’s best interest. Spiegel hinted that she plans on starting Lace back on Lithium so long as Heltzer says it’s safe. You good with that call or you want me to get a second opinion?

“Heltzer was concerned for the baby during the first trimester,” I tell him. “He said any possible birth defects would usually occur during that period. So, if putting her back on the meds is what they say she needs, then give the okay.”

“That’s what I figured,” he says. “She’s gonna fucking hate it.”

“You just gotta remind her our daughter needs her mother. Tell her she’s carried her this far that she can’t give up now. The baby is safe. It’s time to make her mother safe.”

Safe from herself.

From that fucking bitch in her head.

“And while you’re at it, tell her I love her, will you? I don’t know if it sunk in while she was here, but you make sure she knows that, Jack. Make sure she knows how fucking proud I am of her too. Tell her she’s the best mother, the only woman I’d ever want for my daughter’s mother.”

I know I’m rambling but it’s true.

Lacey doesn’t realize how selfless she’s been or how blessed our daughter is. If someone was to grant me one wish, I’d wish our daughter is just as compassionate as the woman who made her.

“Will do.”

“Thank you.”

“Man, stop thanking me,” he growls.

“I don’t know if that will ever happen,” I admit. “Can I ask one more favor?”

“Gonna start charging you.”

“I’m good for it,” I reply.

“You sure about that? I know what you’re paying that fucking lawyer…”

“I’m not hurting, Jack.”

“The favor?”

“As soon as you know something, will you call here?”

“Give him my number,” Sunny offers, pulling out her phone. She turns the screen to me, and I recite the number to Jack. He vows to call tomorrow with an update and before we end the call, he calls my name one more time.

“I’m sorry you didn’t get the chance to make amends with her. For what it’s worth, I know for a fact her heart forgives you.”

I know that too.

I also know I’ve got forever to make her mind forgive me as well.

“I’ve got forever to make amends with her,” I reply. “Besides, it’s not the words that she needs. It’s the actions.”

Sunny smiles.

“You do listen when I talk.”

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