Page 17 of Dirty Deeds

“But that’s not you and Brent.”

“No, it’s not, but I suppose it could’ve worked for the right candidate.”

“I don’t understand. Why would you help him? After everything he did to you…the lying…the cheating…why would you help him clean up his image and potentially trick people into voting for him?”

“I did it for Derek.”

“Derek hates Brent.” She suddenly stands and paces in front of me. “When I told him you were working with him on his campaign, he nearly blew a gasket. Then he sees you on the news with him and he breaks the fucking television.” She spins around to face me. “He got thrown in solitary for that.”

“Brent promised if he got elected, he’d ask the governor to pardon him. It was Derek’s best shot. His only shot, Ro.”

Her face pales at my admission.

“I didn’t just throw myself at Brent and hang on his every word. I told him I needed time to think, that I had to weigh my options. I was finally free and yeah, I was scared to start over, but I knew deep down I could do it. I wanted to do it. I wanted to make the life I dreamed of having. To find a man who loved and respected me. Someone I could raise a family with. I’m thirty-two years old, Ro, my clock is ticking. My mom went through menopause at thirty-nine.”

A pained expression flits across her face and I instantly wish I could take back my words.

“Oh, Ro, I’m sorry. That was insensitive of me.”

“No.” She wipes at her face. “It’s fine. I’ve come to terms with it. I know me and Derek will never have kids of our own and you know what, Dan, I’m okay with it. I’m okay with not being anyone’s mother, because I’m someone’s whole world…even if that someone is in prison, doing time for a crime he didn’t commit. I’m his world and he’s mine and you deserve to know what that feels like.” She sits again, and reaches for my hands, giving them a squeeze. “I wish you would’ve told me before you wasted another six months on that asshole.”

“I didn’t want to get your hopes up, and it’s a good thing because after last night, I’m sure Brent is asking the governor for any favors on my behalf.”

“He can keep his fucking favors. No one wants to be at the mercy of Brent Matthews, especially Derek.” She cocks her head to the side. “You still haven’t explained Enzo.”

“Right, where was I?”

“Christmas.”

“So after Brent left, I went to Big Nose Kate’s, that’s where the Scottos and the Satan’s Knights were celebrating. I sat in my car for hours, trying to work up the nerve to go inside. It wasn’t that I was scared to make a move. I think in the back of my head I had already made the decision to work with Brent and I knew if I went into that bar, I’d be teasing myself. I’d get a taste of something I couldn’t have.”

“But you did it anyway?”

I nod.

“I did and you know what the craziest thing is? All the fears I thought I’d have about getting into bed with another man didn’t exist in that moment.”

I close my eyes and for a moment I let the memory take me away. Then I shake it off just like I’ve done every night since it happened. I meet Ro’s curious gaze.

“I snuck out of his bed before he woke up. I felt awful about leaving him like I did. I mean, the scent of his cologne still clung to my body when I knocked on Brent’s door and accepted his offer.” I shake my head. “It felt like I cheapened a good thing. That’s why I donated the money to Frankie’s House. Enzo spoke a lot about the charity that night and what it meant to his family. It was the closest thing to an apology I could think of.”

“How did he react to the donation?”

“He didn’t. He wasn’t there when I dropped off the check and I never saw him again until last night.”

“That’s crazy.”

“Not so much. His father paid me a visit yesterday. Apparently, Brent has been embezzling money from the charity. Whatever funds are being raised at those silent auctions are not finding their way to Frankie’s House. I don’t know how Wolf found out, but he thought I was in on it. He knows about Derek, and he threatened to send someone into the prison if I didn’t help him expose Brent.”

“Oh my God,” she shrieks, pulling her hands from mine. “They threatened Derek?”

“Calm down, Ro. I highly doubt Derek is anywhere on Wolf’s radar, not with his son being locked up for beating the shit out of Brent.”

She considers that for a moment.

“Do you think Wolf had Enzo follow you?”

“I don’t know. I barely spoke to him. I tried to confront Brent at the fundraiser about the money, but he blew me off. That’s why I followed him to Brooklyn. Needless to say, I didn’t realize I was following him to his whore’s house. That was a nice little surprise. I got out of the car and started screaming at him. Things got out of hand and Brent actually raised his hands to me. He was going to choke me, that’s when Enzo intervened. Ro, in my thirty-two years I have never seen someone become so disconnected. He looked like he was going to kill him and if he didn’t stop when he did, he would have.” I shake my head. “When he snapped out of it, he turned to me and told me I had a choice to make. I could stay and continue to play the part I’ve been playing, or I could leave and finally break free from Brent. No more keeping up with appearances. No more lies.”