Page 61 of Madness

The ECT machine gets wheeled over to where my head lays, with wires hanging everywhere as it looms over me.

Memories of our past sessions flash in my mind, creating a shitty mental scrapbook of all my nightmares since I first came to Wonderland.

Each breath I take is heavy with the dread of what’s about to happen in this room, and I struggle to pull in a lungful of air.

Despite the fear that is gnawing at me, the defiant part of me, the part I refuse to let herbreak, refuses to yield to her games, and I brace myself for whatever twisted ‘game’ White wants to play now.

Chapter Twenty

“Red, Red, Red!” Hare shouts as he bounces along the hallway to Red’s room. Harry, Desmond, and Dusty trail behind us, their footsteps echoing softly against the polished floor, their faces etched with concern.

The excitement in Hare’s voice is contagious, but I can’t help but feel worried that Red missed therapy again today.

The light flickers above us, and I turn to check for the others to make sure the shadows haven’t swallowed them whole.

“How fortunate it would be for you if they had. Then you could play hero to the Queen.”

“Ha! Ha! Ha! Off, off, off withher head!”

“Mad… I’m utterly mad.”

“Mad, mad, mad!” Hare sings songs.

I sigh, but we continue to navigate the twists and turns of the corridors that seem to loop into an endless maze.

The shadows in the corner twist into arms, reaching for me but passing through the others – another sign that I’m getting worse.

I can feel my mind fracturing with each day that passes in this place, and the eerie silence that has fallen over the other patients in the ward only seems to amplify the voices that live in my head.

“We need to find her,” Desmond breaks the silence.

I sigh, frustration creeping into my voice. “Yes, but how? This place is a maze, and she could be anywhere.”

“Hide and seek?” Hare looks at us all, tilting his head, “Red hiding?”

Harry shakes his head, his voice tinged with more worry than I expected, considering how he usually treats her. “This isnae a game, Hare. Red is lost.”

“Lost, lost, lost!” Hare shouts, his voice echoing eerily down the hallway, growing louder instead of fading.

“Is there a chance she’s hiding from everyone? She hasn’t been the same since the mural got washed away,” Desmond says thoughtfully.

“What about Bander’s room?” Dusty voices, a hint of hope in his voice.

“Surely not. Therapy is mandatory; she won’t miss it.” I want to shout her name, to lure her out from wherever she is, but I don’t.

The warden's warning from my first day about monsters that wouldn’t hesitate to kill me lingers in the back of my mind.

We search everywhere we can think of, not daring to step foot into the rabbit hole’s ward.

The closer we got, the more Desmond and Dusty seemed to pale, their faces losing colour in a way that made them look almost ghostly.

The rabbit hole’s ward has a reputation that has patients whisper stories of their time down there, but the fear that laces their voices is what makes it truly terrifying.

With a deep breath, I turn to them and try to keep my voice steady even when I can hear the unease in it. “Are you able to go to solitary?” I ask.

They both nod in unison, but it does nothing to hide the anxious glances they exchange from the corner of their eyes.

“And you?” I ask Harry.

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