Page 5 of Pain and Pleasure

“Esmeralda?”

I stop and tilt my head back in exhaustion. I don’t have it in me to do this with him right now, or you know, like ever.

“I want to see Ricky,” I say over my shoulder.

He’s silent for a few moments, realizing that I’m not going to be giving into him right at this moment. Hopefully he’ll understand that I won’t be giving in ever. I made that pretty clear last night.

“Meet me in my office in twenty minutes. He needs time to wake up and I’m sure you would like a shower.” I nod at him and walk upstairs, ignoring his last call of my name when I shut my bedroom door in his face.

Good, let him grovel.

3

Esmeralda

I takethe longest shower known to mankind.

I know Ricky is probably pissed at me even more now, but I'm fucking exhausted. I've had a gun pointed at my head for the majority of my morning, needless to say I'm a little over it.

I dress quickly in a pair of leggings and a sweater. I don't bother wearing a bra, it's not like the two men I'm about to meet with haven't seen my nipples anyway. I could honestly care less about much today. Really just Ricky, my poor and innocent Ricky. His mom is going to be worried fucking sick and that breaks my heart more than Dante ever could.

I make my way down the stairs and round the corner towards Dante's office. The library is big and cozy, so I decide that tonight I may grab a book and ignore everyone. Maybe even a glass of bourbon. It sounds like a great idea actually, because the further I walk towards Dante's quarters, the better I can hear the shouting.

Ricky.

I take a deep breath when I stop outside of Dante's bedroom door, bracing myself for the hellfire that is both him and my best friend.

When I step inside, I see Ricky's furiously terrified eyes and then Dante's annoyed ones.

"There you fucking are! Your fuck buddy hit me over the head with agun, a gun Emmie! Now we're God knows where, looking at the most depressing fucking furniture I've ever seen."

I hold back my laugh because Dante looks appalled by that comment. It makes Ricky shout louder.

"For Christ’s sake Emmie, what the fuck is going on! Are we being held for ransom? Did your mom fuck with the wrong gang? Why the fuck are we here!"

I walk towards him, my palms raised in weariness. I feel so awful for letting this new and dark world touch him, but a sick part of me is thankful that he's here. I'm thankful that I'm not alone anymore, and that he's safe as long as he's here. Even if he doesn't think so.

"You're not too far off Ricky. I can't go too far into detail, but I promise you, no matter how fucking twisted these people are, they're better than the alternative-"

"Watch it, Esmeralda," Dante cuts in. "You're lucky I haven't knocked him out for being annoyingly loud yet again. I don't want to do it because you've opened your pretty mouth too much again. Now both of you, sit down."

Ricky and I sit on the leather loveseat behind us, facing Dante's large desk as he leans back in his chair. His five o’clock shadow is growing thicker by the second, his amber eyes looking tired. He's still beautiful like this, but he's also a bastard.

My palm is itching, but I want to do more than slap him. I want to rip his fucking head off, but I refrain. I grab Ricky's hands and I notice Dante looks strangely at that, almost jealous. I squeeze harder and keep my eyes on Ricky, trying to keep him calm. He looks back at me with sad and confused eyes, and my heart breaks at the sight.

"You've known him a lot longer than just this week, haven't you?"

I nod slowly, he sighs deeply.

"He's why you were gone suddenly a couple weeks ago. He took you and your mom. I saw her on the way in."

I nod again, tears forming in my eyes, but I will them back. It feels so good to have him know some of the truth. The weight lifting off me allows me to finally breathe deeply and fully.

"I told you, you weren't too far off. She fucked up again Ricky, bad this time. Bad enough to land me here withhim." I nudge my shoulder in Dante's direction and I swear I hear a growl come from him.

"I can't tell you everything, but I can tell you this has been a part of my life much longer than you'd expect. He knows more about us than anyone. And I know that sounds scary, I know this is all confusing and-"

"Fucking terrifying?" He cuts me off, but his face is softening. Because he can hear the truth in my voice, he can feel it in my hands. That bond we've had since we were little kids. The bond that will forever be my salvation in this fucked up life.

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