Page 105 of Italy Can Bite Me

Through the windshield, I watch my seniors laughing together on their picnic blankets. Chester’s telling another terrible joke. The Dawson sisters are sharing a bottle of wine. This—this is what touring should be. Real connections. Real joy.

But dreams don’t pay bank loans.

“Yes. I’m stepping away from my company.” The words are a surrender.

“You mean you’re bankrupt.”

My fingers curl into a fist. “No, it’s… personal reasons. But I’d like to bring my bus driver with me.”

“Ah, still sentimental! Well, you always had the best reviews. I do this for you, but just remember—no funny business. Stick to the schedule.”

“I understand.”

“Fantastico. You start in Rome in two days.”

My heart stops. “Sorry, but I’ll need more time to get my affairs settled.”

“Now or never, Monti. I had a guide quit this morning.”

Katie’s face flashes through my mind—earlier today, wearing my shirt, her hair a mess from my hands, planning our next two weeks together with that expression of wonder.

But I’m chaos incarnate. A man who couldn’t even keep his parents’ dream alive. What could I possibly offer her now? She deserves better than a failed tour guide who can’t fucking balance his own books.

She cares about you, my heart whispers.

She shouldn’t, my brain answers.

I’m worthless. It’s over. I lost.

“I’ll be there.” My voice sounds dead even in my own ears.

“Excellent! Welcome back to—”

I hang up before he can finish his victory speech. The phone slips from my numb fingers onto the seat.

Through the window, I spot Howie helping Deb adjust her sun hat, both of them laughing. They make it look so easy—choosing love, choosing joy.

But some of us don’t get those choices. Some of us must accept reality and admit we’re not good enough.

I shouldn’t be surprised that it’s over. Since I lost my parents, every good thing in my life eventually slips away.

Why should Katie stay?

If walking away makes me a coward, then maybe I am—because I don’t know how to stand in front of her without breaking.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

KATIE

Mom:Deborah says you’ll be in Rome tomorrow. You should share that on social media. Who knows? It might be the nudge Jared needs to show up and win you back.

Me:Or I could toss my phone in the Trevi Fountain so you can’t text me anymore.

Mom:C’mon, imagine: You turn around and there he is… holding flowers!

Me:You really need to get off Pinterest.

Mom:Don’t be ridiculous! Rome was made for falling in love again.

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