Page 78 of Hawaii Can Suck It

“His unpredictable mood swings. It’s like dating a rollercoaster, without a harness.”

“Wrong. It’s my eyes. Sorry, but there are wrong answers. Or you could have said my abs, since you can’t stop staring at them.”

“I’m staring because there’s a spider on you.”

“WHAT?!” I do a full body shimmy, and she doubles over laughing.

“Made you dance!”

“You’re evil. Sexy, but evil. Next question…” I scroll through the comments. “Where did you grow up, and did you like it?”

“New York City! And yes, I loved it. I haven’t been back in a while though. I really miss my family.”

“Maybe I’ll surprise you with a visit home so I can meet them.”

Her eyes snap to mine, searching for the joke.

Am I messing with her?

Huh… I don’t know.

“You’d like to meet my family? You do realize a visit with myabuelaincludes force-feeding and overshares. You think you can handle that?”

“Sounds like a good time.”

“She’ll try to marry us for real when she sees those abs and that Amex.”

“Smart woman. I like her already. And guys, Cam has a sister named Aria who’s a chef in New York,” I add, watching her reaction.

“You… remember that?” She recovers quickly. “Well, when we’re in New York, Aria’s opening up her own food truck. All our favorite Puerto Rican recipes. If you fly me home, we’ll go eat there. Keep your notifications on, squad!”

She flashes a smile—one that says she’s nailing our fake relationship performance.

I tilt her chin to meet my gaze. “Wherever you feel like going, I’ll take you.”

She sucks in a breath. And for a solid five seconds, we drink each other in.

“Careful with those promises, Dare. A girl might start believing them.”

“Maybe she should.”

“Says the man who ate the world’s hottest curries then cried for three hours.”

“First off, it was a heroic display of emotion. Secondly, those curries were clearly marinated in dragon’s breath.”

“Sure, blame the curry. Not your inability to handle spicy foods.”

“My abs and my spice tolerance are the stuff of legends!”

“The same six pack that got scared by an imaginary spider?”

The chat crumbles into chaos:

I’VE NEVER SHIPPED ANYTHING HARDER.

THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HER… HOLY SHIT.

NO BUT FR, HOW DO I INSERT MYSELF IN THIS LOVE STORY?

---