Page 109 of The Plan

“Sure, Sage.” She studies me for a second, then nods softly.

“Promise me you’re okay?” I’m looking right at her as I lie.

“Promise.” She smiles and bends down to place a short kiss on my cheek, then walks out, leaving me to enjoy my high.

I stare up at the ceiling as everything floats away. My headache, the pain in my arm. The pain in my chest after hearing how cold Vidia was with me. I feel the hole in my chest start to fill back up again. The hole left behind when I heard the doctor say our baby didn’t have a heartbeat.

“Why did I stop?” Why would I ever stop getting high when I can always feel like this?

“Why did you stop what?” I turn my head toward August. I didn’t hear him come in. When I turn my head back, I notice the time says6:14. How ironic is that? Wait. Have I been sitting here for a fucking hour?

I turn back to August as he sits on the other end of the couch. “How long ago did you get here?” My voice comes out a lot more confused than I wanted it to sound.

“Twenty minutes ago? When you opened the door for me?”Shit.I think for a second, and I remember that happening vaguely. I sniff in when I feel my nose running.

“Are you okay?” He sounds scared, but he shouldn’t be. I didn’t take enough for an overdose. A few more, however… I lightly snicker at that.However. It’s such a weird word. How. Ever. I lightly chuckle, then turn to August.

“I’m fine, Hale.” We only ever call each other by our last names to bug each other, but he doesn’t look like he thinks it’s funny. Party pooper. Buzz killer. I hold back a laugh and get up from the couch to go into my room because his vibes are ruining my high.

“Vibes.Vibes.” That word feels so weird. It kind of vibrates. Everything is a bit hazy, but that’s just the way I like it. My phone starts ringing, and I almost don’t answer until I notice the area code. I clear my throat and put on my professional voice.

“Hello?”Why did I say that in a girl's voice?I cover my mouth and hold back a laugh.

“Hi, this is Fred Chamlet with the Los Angeles Dodgers.” I snicker at his last name and cover it up with a cough. Chamlet.It sounds like chowder.Focus.

“Is this Sire Griffin?”

“Yes, it is.”I used my man voice this time. Good job.I keep zoning in and out as he tells me how much of a great player I am and how he loved watching me at our last game. A few ofthe other sponsors called me already, but I was waiting for the Dodgers. They’re the dream team and all.

“I’d like to set up a meeting with you and your brother, August Hale. We normally do meetings separately but make exceptions for siblings.” I tell him how flattered I am, trying to voice some enthusiasm, but that’s hard when you’re as high as a fucking kite.

He goes on to say what the meeting will entail, hinting that he’s going to offer us a seat on the team. I can’t help but think about what Vidia said.“When you make it to the major league, and you will, thanks to me.”

It’s not official yet, but it’s safe to say I made it. I wish I could tell her that this was never the plan.

“Are you still there?”

“Yes, sorry. That sounds great, thank you again Mr—” I quickly stop myself from laughing and clear my throat. “Mr. Chamlet.” He says he’ll see me tomorrow, and when I flop onto my bed, I hear August’s phone ringing. After a few minutes, he comes barging into my room.

“Guess who just fucking called me!”

“Fred Chowder with the Los Angeles Dodgers?” I mock Mr. Chamlet’s voice and lightly laugh. August's brows furrow a bit, and then his smile somehow grows.

“Fred Chamlet.” He sounds like he’s correcting me, but I’m pretty sure that’s what I said. “Did he call you too? Holy shit, we’re going to the fucking major leagues!”

I squint my eyes at him, unable to tell if he’s actually jumping up and down or if these drugs are just making me see shit. I don’t think I like Adderall. I need Oxy… Now.

“I know it’s not set in stone, but aren’t you excited?”

“Ecstatic.” I fist pump the air. He frowns, his excitement wiped clean, and walks out of my room, leaving me to feel, once again, utterly alone.

“Are you ready?”

“No, I can’t tie this stupid fucking tie.” I yank the tie off and throw it onto the bed. When I turn to August, his tie is already tied around his neck.

“Hazel did it for me,” he says with a shrug. “Here.”

He hands me a black tie matching his, and it’s already tied. All I have to do is readjust over my head. I reach for it and then pause. Hazel can’t tie a tie. I remember during graduation, Vidia tied it for both of us. I feel a knot in my throat, but I clear it and then take the tie from him, mumbling a thanks.