Page 190 of Without Fault

I go still, almost afraid to breathe.

“He hit her once, right on her tiny head, and just like that, I lost my sister. I'm pretty sure he blacked out since he looked shocked as they put him in the back of a police car… he killed himself a few days later. ” He brings his other hand to my cheek before wiping my tears. “If I didn't go-”

“Uh uh.” I cut him off before grabbing his other hand. “Donotblame yourself for that, Liam. Absolutely not.”

A bitter smile touches his lips at my tone, and I lean forward to kiss him.

“Nothing I can say can bring her back or make you feel better, but it wasn't your fault, and you arenotyour father. You have some… slight anger issues.”

He laughs softly before wiping his cheek.

“But you sure as hell do have control over it. You're even in therapy!” I remind him. “You're not like him.”

Clarity fills his eyes, and he lets out a scoff.

“What?” I cup his face.

He holds my hand as he shakes his head. “It's something my therapist and I were talking about… I've been so angry at myself for being like my dad, but I'm not him.” He says it as if he's just realizing that now.

“Of course you're not, Liam.”

He looks between my eyes, tears welling in his again. “It feels like that sometimes… Like I was just as responsible for killing her.”

I shake my head and wrap my arms around him when another tear falls. “You're not a bad person for going to that party.” I pull away for a small kiss before leaning my forehead against his. “You're not a bad person in general. You're perfect, and before you disagree, don't waste your breath because you're perfect to me. You're loveable, Liam. You're worthy of love and everything else you could wish for.”

“I only want to be worthy of you.”

“You are especially worthy of me.” My lips meet his, and I tell him I love him in a different way.

Chapter Forty-Five

Sage

“How long have you beendoing this?” I turn to Liam and he keeps his eyes on the road as he drives to the Yankee Stadium.

When he told me he had an event this weekend, I cleared my schedule to come with him simply to see him interact with the kids. He’s giving a tour of the stadium to kids with disabilities, and this is the last kind of event I expected him to host.

“I’ve been doing this twice a year since I was signed with the Yankees.”

I smile at his words as he goes on.

“It’s for my sister…” He keeps his eyes on the road and I can see his shield go up, like it took a lot for him to simply say that but I hold his hand and give him a reassuring squeeze, silently urging him to continue but he doesn’t.

“Did she have a disability?” I keep my tone light, and when he pulls in a deep breath, I can tell he’s just trying to find the right words, so I don’t push him.

“Yeah, she had Down syndrome.” He suddenly looks so lost, and it hurts to see how torn he is as he talks about her. “She wasborn prematurely, and I was so scared that she wasn’t going to make it out of the NICU, but then she did, and… my whole world turned upside down.”

He turns to look at me, and a soft smile touches my lips. “I bet you were a great big brother.”

“I thought you were certain that I was an only child or the youngest?” He teases and I immediately remember my words from a month ago. “What was it you said? I’m mean and seemed like I never had to share my toys?”

I laugh softly before pushing his hand away, but he reaches for me again with a small smile. “We had a fourteen-year age gap, so you were sort of right, I never had to share my toys with her, but she loved to eat offmyplate, even when we had the same fucking thing.”

The car fills with my laugh, and he glances over at me with a small smile. After a beat, a sad look washes over his face, and he’s quiet for a minute before saying, “I just wish she was here sometimes.”

He sounds so… desperate. I feel my nose burn as my eyes tear. “Oh, Liam…”

He keeps his eyes on the road but I notice him force the lump down his throat.

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