Page 168 of Losing Faith

I open my mouth to respond, but nothing comes out and he storms off before I can think to say anything. I’m stuck in place before my shoulders slouch.

I feel my cheeks burn in embarrassment, feeling like an idiot simply standing in his house. I turn back to the stove and take the chicken out of the oil before turning the fire off and leaving.

When I get into my car, I throw my bag in the passenger seat, frustrated with myself. Everything in my purse spills onto the ground and I look up to the roof of my car, silently collecting myself for a moment.

I feel like all I’ve been doing is messing everything up recently. I feel my mood plummeting and quickly force myself out of this rabbit hole. Letting out an exasperated breath, I lean over my console to grab my things. As I’m putting everything back in my bag, my eyes land on the small mint box on the ground.

I go still, contemplating my entire life as I stare at the small box.

Don’t, Lis.

Deep down I want to listen to that voice. I want to leave that box where I strategically placed it for a rainy day.

“It was one fight, Lisette. This isn’t a rainy day,” I remind myself.

My eyes remain glued on the mint box, and when my brain starts making a pros and cons list, I know I’m fucked.

I grab the box and lean in my seat as I rotate it in my hands a few times.

You don’t need to kill yourself over this, stop being dramatic.

I roll my eyes at my thoughts. “I’m not going to fucking overdose.” I open the cap and stare at the white pills. My heart races and I quickly place the top back on.

“I don’t need it.”

No, but you want it.

I shut my eyes, focusing on my breathing, but the box in my hand is nearly shouting at me.

You can take one and be fine.

“I’m going to want more…”

No, you have self-control. Just take one.

I open the mint box again and stare down at the pills. Slowly, I pick one up, rolling it between my fingers.

I just want a few hours without this fucking feeling.

My vision starts to blur and how emotional I’ve been recently pisses me off more. I quickly drop the pill and take off driving. I almost go to see Sire, but Sage is closer. I’m in front of her apartment complex, the pill on my lap.

I stare down at my kryptonite as I weigh my options. I should go upstairs and let her help.

You can take onethengo upstairs and let her help.

I shake my head at myself and a tear lands on my cheek. A lump grows in my throat as I grab one of the pills, and I quickly swallow it before I can weigh the right choice.

Chapter Fifty-One

Lisette

WhenSage’sdoorswingsopen,I’m surprised when my eyes land on her fiancé.

“Hi.” I stare up at him and his glare settles on me before he steps aside. I stifle a laugh as I decide to fuck with him. “You know,” I start before leaning against the door frame. “I really love this Frankenstein’s monster thing you got going on. Big, scary, only talks in grunts.”

Liam looks like he could die of boredom as he watches me.

“What exactly did you do to make my sister fall for you?” I ask, genuinely curious considering Sage is a ball of sunshine compared to this man.