Page 46 of Losing Faith

“Yes, it’s an issue. I need to get back to my routine or I’ll fall off the deep end and I’m not having a good week. Do you want me to fall off the deep end? Do you want my cause of death to beJackson decided to cancel the highlight of Lisette’s week?”

He chuckles before going quiet, then: “Is tutoring really your only reason to get out of bed?”

“No,” I partly lie.

“But it’s the highlight of your week?”

“Yeah,” I answer truthfully this time. His daughter is a handful but that just means she’s a good distraction. I haven’t been drinking on days I tutor her, besides today, but that’s only because I was nervous about confessing to Bay.

I can’t have my three-hour distraction cut from my day, especially not now.

Jackson hums in thought. “Well, I’m not canceling my afternoon with her so she can study with you. She’ll see it as punishment and it’s a tradition that we go apple picking, so just come with us and you can read with her for a bit when we get back.”

I almost make a joke about them having a cornytraditionuntil my brain catches up to where they’re going. “Did you say apple picking?” I sit up.

“Yeah, I can pick you up in ten if you’re free now.”

“Yeah, I’ll be ready.” I rise from my seat before hanging up,desperatefor an escape and a distraction because if I leave myself to think for more than five minutes, I’m going to want to drink.

“Woah.” Bay looks between me and my phone. “Who got your mood changing so quickly?”

I roll my eyes at her before wiping my smile. “Not who.What.” My smile returns despite my efforts. “I’m going apple picking.”

Bay shakes her head at me as she follows me into my room. “What is your deal with apples?”

“It’s the tree,” I clarify. “They symbolize many things, but—”

“The redemption and love sticks with you,” she finishes for me. “Yeah, you talk about this all the time. I still don’t get it. You’re so spiritual for someone so depressed.”

“Screw you.” I let out a laugh as I walk into my closet for a change of clothes.

“Are you going with your brothers?”

“No. One of their friends.”

“Hold up.” Bay is leaning against my closet door now. “You’refuckingyour brother’s friend and he’s still breathing?”

I tilt my head back with a laugh as she watches me, her mouth ajar. “I amnotsleeping with him.”

She looks like she doesn’t believe a word I’m spitting.

“Trust me, you’d know if I was sleeping with him because I wouldn’t shut up about it. This man is a hot dad. You’ll be the first to know when he’s in my pants.”

“He’s adad?” She lights up at my words. “Of course, you and your daddy issues want to sleep with him.” She shakes her head as she squints her eyes at me.

I’m hysterical in my closet and I hear her laughing behind me. “I never said I want to sleep with him, I just said I’ll tell you if Idosleep with him.” While I’m constantly making flirty comments to Jackson, I don’t mean any of them and he knows that. I just like getting a reaction out of him, and since I have daddy issues, I also like when he tells me to stop doing it. I like when he tells me what to do in general.

“You saidwhenhe’s in your pants.”

I pause, replaying my own words—and damn, she’s right.

“I don’t blame you. You say he’s hot. He has an offspring. He’s your brother’s friend, which makes this whole thing dirty and forbidden. Ugh.” She lets out a sigh as she fans herself. “I think I want to sleep with him. You should share.”

I roll my eyes at her with a smile as I change my shirt. “He’s so type A, he probably doesn’t even do threesomes.” I turn to her. “Now that I think about it, he’s probably not good in bed. I can totally see him being all soft and kissing my scars and shit.”

She rolls her eyes at me. “God forbid a man be kind to you in the bedroom and show affection.” She turns more serious and I flip her off.

“Have you met the mom?”

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