Page 59 of Under the Influence

Eventually, I text Tuesday for help. Outside the house, my brothers yell playful insults at West. He hollers back. The homestead is alive with its usual fun, yet I’m trapped in this house with only my angst to keep me company.

Tuesday simply glows as she enters the house. Love has been so easy for her while it makes me unhinged. I’m certain I’ve lost my dream guy despite Duke texting me an hour ago with a picture of his breakfast at his ma’s diner. He’s also been calling me to complain about Dallas who is threatening to visit and “put Val to the test.” Duke and I have been in constant communication, yet he feels a million miles away. I’m losing my damn mind!

Stopping me from making another circle around the couch, Tuesday asks, “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t say,” I mumble before crying, “I won’t say!”

Tuesday flinches at my high-pitched words. Rebounding quickly, she murmurs, “Whoa, you deflowered minx, what’s happening? Is this about your boyfriend?”

“Maybe,” I whisper, avoiding her hug. “Help me.”

“I’m trying, but I don’t know what’s wrong.”

“I messed up,” I whisper and look around like someone might be spying. “I did the spermicide and condom method. I was very careful about doing it right. Well, mostly. But during that first night, when we were half-asleep...”

When I don’t finish, Tuesday nods. “You needed a late-night jizz snack and skipped the condom.”

“I thought the spermicide was still working, but it’s not as foolproof.”

“No, it’s not. But why are you panicking? Hasn’t it only been like a week?”

“It was two weeks ago.”

Tuesday’s blue eyes widen and grow bright before she asks in a loud whisper, “Wait, are you late?”

“Yes!” I squeal and start hyperventilating.

“Have you taken a test?”

Regaining control of myself, I whisper, “No.”

“I can get you one.”

“No, then, I’ll know the answer.”

“But that’s the right choice here.”

“No,” I say, pulling her closer. “If I know, I’ll have to tell Duke. He’ll think I’m trapping him. If I don’t know, I can let things work out more organically.”

“Um, okay. Let’s do that.”

Nodding along with Tuesday, I feel calmer until I think of Duke’s reaction.

“He’s not sure he wants kids,” I hiss at Tuesday and then whimper, “I’m trying to be brave and believe in the magic.”

“The magic is real.”

“What if it’s not for me? Duke might leave me.”

“Even if he dumps you, he’ll soon realize he’s making a mistake and come back. You’ll only need to cry for a few minutes.”

Thinking of how Bullet temporarily left the homestead, breaking Tuesday’s heart for all of fifteen minutes, I mumble, “I’m not you, and Duke isn’t Bullet.”

“No, of course, you aren’t me, honey. That’s why you used store-bought birth control instead of the heavy-duty shit I use.”

“You know the pill makes me hostile toward all male humans.”

“To be fair, you were also terrifying to female humans.”

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