Page 17 of Clint & Ivy

Elle handed me a pair of boy jeans and gestured for me to fold them. I imitated her next to the bed by the window.

“We need to get you set up with the basics, so you’re not wearing my ill-fitting clothes. Normally, Clint prefers to shop online, but certain things will need to be picked up by people working for us.”

“I don’t have any money. My uncle has our last working credit card. I don’t even have enough to pay for a soda.”

“Clint can pay for whatever you need. If you want a job or something, we can worry about that later. Just settle down and focus on him. That way, you’ll know if what he feels is the same thing you do.”

I stopped folding and considered how much my life had changed over the last few hours.

“I was always on my own. I didn’t get to be around people,” I said, feeling lost again. “I’m afraid to say or do the wrong thing. Clint is so handsome and confident, while I’m barely holding on. Why would he keep me around?”

Elle stopped folding and leaned her hip against the mattress. Her gray eyes studied me.

“When you were trapped at your house all that time, didn’t you imagine what freedom would feel like?”

“Of course.”

“Well, I’d suggest you worry less about pleasing Clint and focus more on figuring out what you want. This is your chance to try different things and understand yourself better. Don’t pretend to like what Clint likes. Just be yourself. If that isn’t enough for Clint, so be it.”

Much like her brother, Elle’s presence calmed me. Maybe that was why I stopped editing myself and asked about my biggest fear.

“Your advice sounds emotionally healthy, but I want Clint to like me. Not just because he saved me. I also really like him, but I’m afraid I’m too boring or weird to keep his interest.”

“You can’t force these things. Some people are like magnets, attracted to each other even if there’s no sense behind it,” Elle said and then shrugged. “But I don’t know about the romantic shit. However, I noticed Clint didn’t tell me about your great qualities because he doesn’t know them. He’s working on a more primal wavelength. That part of him wants you. Does that part of you want him?”

I imagined Clint in the next room. He was too handsome to be real. I ought to feel flustered by such beauty in a man, but his presence made me hopeful instead.

“Clint feels special.”

“Well, he is. Even without all the romantic shit, my brother is a great man. If he wasn’t, half our club would drop him tomorrow. He keeps wild people in check without being an asshole about it.”

I struggled with the idea of Clint as both the sweet guy who saved me and the dangerous man he kept hidden. His home was warm and inviting. His sister slept over at his place with her son. Clint owned a little dog. He didn’t seem dangerous. Yet, when he moved at the gas station, my instincts warned that I had agreed to ride with someone willing to spill blood.

“I have a favor to ask,” Elle said and patted the bed by the window where the clothes were folded. “My son doesn’t want girl cooties on his bed. As long as you’re sleeping in here, stick to my bed, okay?”

“Of course.”

“I like how agreeable you are,” Elle said and smiled widely. “I have so many aggressive people in my life. It’s nice to have a pushover. At least, for now. Who knows what kind of demonic force you might become once you get your bearings in Little Memphis?”

“Wait,” I whispered and reached for her when she went for the door, “I’m afraid about what happens when you leave.”

“Clint isn’t going to fuck you tonight, Ivy,” Elle replied, looking irritated. “He wants to get to know you. So, unless you’re afraid of talking about yourself, then you have nothing to fear.”

“But Iamafraid to talk about myself. I’ve never done anything. I don’t have any friends or funny stories. Clint has a life full of people.”

“Then ask him questions and let him talk. He knows you’re coming from a train wreck past. He’s more interested in your future anyway.”

Why wasn’t I reassured by Elle’s words?The answer was obvious. This was my big shot after years of hoping. But it had all happened so quickly. This morning, I thought I’d be dead soon. Now, I stood in a gorgeous man’s condo. I wasn’t prepared for this moment.

“Crap,” Elle said, walking to me. “I made you cry.”

“No, not you,” I whimpered. “I feel safe here, so everything that happened over the last week is now hitting me. Like, I miss my old room. It sounds so awful to care about belongings. But my room was my only real safe space. My belongings were all I had, and they’re gone forever.”

“What did you leave behind?” she asked and had me sit next to her on her bed.

As tears burned my eyes and slid down my cheeks, I mumbled, “When my mom would go through trends, she would buy me clothes to fit the style. They were like snapshots of our time together. There was also the painting she made for me when she was into art. And my grandma left me all her snow globes and thimbles from when she traveled as a young woman. Everything left behind might just be objects, but they also symbolized the best pieces of my family. And I’ll never see them again.”

Covering my face, I cried over how far away my home felt. I worried about Uncle Dwight, imagining him alone and confused. My life had been lonely, but it felt safe. Then, Uncle Linus stole everything from me.

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