Page 33 of Toxic Biker

“You think I don’t know that? I’ve believed those words for years because I was the one repeating them to myself the entire time. I don’t need you or anyone else, for that matter, to tell me I’m unworthy. I’ve lived that title my entire life and I don’t expect it to change where she’s concerned, but you know what? She’ll never think of me as not being worthy of her, because I’ll do everything in my power to be better for her.”

“Dad won’t let this happen; you know it,” he mumbles. His mouth is still fucked up, but it’s way better than it was when I first got to him at the nightclub. It’s amazing what the body can do in a week’s time. Baker’s daughter and Whiskey’s doctor lady friend fixed him up pretty damn good for not being in an emergency room, because every single one of us knows it’s where he actually needed to be that night. I’m sure the antibiotics we had on hand and were able to score more of have played a big part in him getting better, but those two women are worth their weight in gold.

“Funny you should bring him up. I had a long talk with him the night Lacey showed up and told me you were missing. I was floored that he knew who took you and he left the country to save himself. He wrote you off, Seth. Told me if you were still alive, I could have what I needed if I believed I could get you back home. He signed the house over to me, put the cars in my name, and wired over more money than I’ve ever had into my bank account. I told him he could keep it all, that Lacey had bartered herself for my help and I’d taken everything she offered.”

He gasps.

I don’t give a fuck. So I continue. “You know what he said to me?”

He shakes his head, fist clenching. Only one because his other wrist is broken. I was right when I first laid eyes on his hand, and how it was bent funny. He’s pissed, keeping his words to himself at the moment, and I have to admit, it’s probably the smartest thing for him to do right now. I won’t hurt him, he’s already too fucked up, but I’ll send him out on his ass if he’s ugly to my woman.

“He told me that if there was anyone he could trust to keep his daughter safe and to love her completely, it was me. He said that your mom would be relieved to hear I’d taken Lacey as mine and how she could finally stop worrying about her so badly. That being said, I gotta ask. What the fuck have you been doing the past couple of years that your family didn’t think you’d protect Lacey more than anyone else, and what the fuck did you do to get mixed up with the cartel? Your father was worried you’d turned to drugs, but it’s just not adding up to me.”

He huffs, but I cut him off. “No. I don’t give a fuck if you’re hurt. I saved your ass. I got you the help you desperately needed, then you come here and treat the woman I love like shit? Not on my watch,friend. I suggest you reevaluate your shit and start talking. And while we’re on the topic, make sure you apologize to your sister. If it weren’t for her, you’d still be property of Carlos Montoya in his fucking nightclub zoo or whatever the fuck he helps run around the world. Hell, you’d most likely be dead at this point. I bet they only kept you alive because they thought they’d get something out of your parents, Lacey, and then me. However, the only thing I was willing to offer was bullets and a deep hole to lay their cold, dead bodies in.”

“You’ve changed so much,” he whispers, adjusting back to close his eyes for a beat. I know he’s in pain. I can see it written all over him, but it gives him no right to treat Lacey with anything but love and gratitude.

“I grew up. I adapted and overcame.”

“How’s your mom?”

“I’m not talking about her, don’t try to change the subject.”

“You know I donated to her treatment? She wouldn’t take help from you, she told me. Said she didn’t want you to worry that she needed anything, so she always told you no, but she didn’t with me.”

“You helped her?” I ask, attempting to not get choked up. Why didn’t she tell me she needed anything? I want to help her, shit, with anything! Let me help in some possible way other than her push me away and ignore me so she can die with a clearer conscious. She thinks keeping me away and in the dark will help when she passes. She doesn’t realize she’s been breaking my heart ever since she decided to close me out and tell me to stop trying to be there for her.

He barely nods, but I see it. “I take care of the hospice and anything else she needs, including her morphine and other meds. She didn’t want to leave you with any medical bills, so I told her I would make sure it didn’t happen. I figure it’s one less thing she has to worry about. I’ve always hoped it’d help her get better in some way, not having the added pressure on her about it.”

Tears crest, but I push those motherfuckers back down. Clearing my throat, I give a jerky nod. I can’t talk about this right now. My mother is literally knocking on death’s door and refuses to see me. It’s killing me inside and having Lacey around has somehow eased some of the blackness that’s been descending on me for as long as I can remember. The shit going down with Seth has been one big distraction I needed before I completely spiraled out of control. “I’ll pay you back,” I manage to choke out.

“Fuck you. It’s my gift to give her and I’ve already given it.”

“I love Lacey,” I declare, not knowing what else to say.

“So stop,” he grumbles, but I feel like he’s finally beginning to take me seriously about my feelings.

“At this point, I don’t think I ever can, no matter how hard I try. I’ve claimed her here. My brothers already voted and she’s my ol’ lady now. I want to marry her someday. I want her to have my babies someday. But mostly, I just want to love her with every beat my heart has left and watch her grow old at my side.”

“Damn it, Ash. Why of all people did you have to fall for my little sister?”

“Why not?”

“She’s the best woman I know,” he states as adamantly as he can with his injuries.

“I know. Trust me, I know. I haven’t been able to get her off of my mind for years. I think I’ve always loved her in a sense, but it just changed one day. She’s it for me, man. My forever.”

He grows quiet again, solemn. I switch the subject. “I’ve given you time in your head to sort through shit, but I need to know what went down. Why did those fuckers think you stole from them?”

“Because I did. Only, they thought I redirected their money into my personal account. In reality, I sent it to a foundation.”

“What the fuck, why? Were you trying to die? Drugs or money, you don’t touch them when they belong to the motherfucking cartel. El Pecado is already known for being viscous.”

He slowly shakes his head, true fury filling his gaze for the first time since I found him. “When I was looking into their assets, I started noticing irregularities. I followed the trail where the money led.”

“Okay…and?”

“I don’t know if you’re aware of everything me and Dad do at the firm. We essentially dive into people’s financials and put their money wherever we see fit to turn a large profit. It’s a hefty risk for a potentially obscene reward. It’s how Dad has built everything he has.”

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