Page 255 of His Virgin Romance Series

CHAPTER38

Abby

The conversationI’d had with the cops had helped somewhat. I suppose in some strange way, it was closure. I knew that Walter Black or Ghost or whoever he was, was really and truly gone. I remembered the moment I’d smashed into him. His body had felt like a boulder in my path, and even though I’d seen him collapse, even though I believed he had died, I hadn’t hung around long enough to find out.

With the car stalled and broken, I got out and ran in the opposite direction, praying that he was dead or at the very least unable to run after me. The cops had assured me that he was, in fact, dead and that there were no charges placed on me because of the fact that I had been acting in self-defense. It was really the best-case scenario considering the circumstances, and I was relieved.

But now that that particular hurdle was done with, my mind was free to think about the next decision I had to make. I couldn’t stay in the house anymore with the boys. Ryder had offered me protection until Walter Black was dealt with. He hadn’t allowed me permanent residence though, nor did I expect it. This wasn’t my life… and the incident with Walter Black had made me realize that it never would be.

Ryder had always been really honest about who he was and what he wanted. And now I knew I had to be honest with myself. Ryder had been clear from the beginning: he was not a one-woman kind of guy. He was not big on long-term commitments. But the truth was that I was, and attempting to continue a relationship with him could only end in heartbreak… at least in my case.

I was self-aware enough to admit that I loved him. He was the first man I had ever felt so strongly about, but I knew that I couldn’t stay in this town anymore. It was too close to him. I would drive myself crazy. So my only real option was to leave. To start someplace new and hopefully with time I would learn to live without Ryder.

It felt a daunting task, but it was my only option. I was thinking about that when Devon walked into the kitchen.

“Hi,” he said brightly. “You’re finally out of your room.”

“I just came to grab something to eat,” I said.

“At least your appetite is coming back.”

“Slowly,” I nodded.

“I know this is probably an annoying question, but how are you?”

I smiled. “I’m good… most of the time. I suppose I’m just preoccupied.”

“About… Walter?”

“No,” I said. “About my future… I’m thinking of leaving soon.”

“I can find you a small apartment close by,” Devon suggested.

“No,” I said. “I appreciate that but… I’m actually thinking about leaving town.”

“Oh,” Devon said, and I could tell he hadn’t expected that. “Really?”

“I think I need a fresh start,” I nodded. “Away from…all this.”

“Away from this lifestyle, you mean?” Devon asked.

“I don’t judge you, Devon,” I said. “Honestly, actually a part of me understands why you’ve chosen this life. There is a brotherhood here that’s hard to deny. But that’s exactly my point. It’s a brotherhood, and there’s no room for me here.”

“I’ll do some research for you,” Devon told me. “I’m sure there are tons of nice little towns you can settle in.”

“A town like this would be nice,” I said.

Devon gave me a wink and left. I put together a small plate of food and headed upstairs to my room. About an hour later, Devon appeared at my door with some information for me.

“Here you go,” he said, handing me the paper. “This might help you make your decision.”

I smiled and took the paper from him. “Thanks, Devon,” I said. “You know… I wish we had grown up together.”

He seemed unexpectedly touched by my words, and he lowered his eyes for a moment. “Me too,” he said quietly, before turning and walking down the stairs.

I turned on some music, settled on the bed, and started reading through the information that Devon had put together for me. Seeing my options there on paper made it all the more real, and I felt nervous and scared. But that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes the best things could come out of fear. I had never expected to be able to defend myself, but now I had confidence and strength. And those skills had helped save my life.

I was still trying to make a decision when I heard a knock on my door. I went to answer it and found Ryder standing there with an unreadable expression on his face. His hazel eyes were obviously hooded, and his body language was slightly tense.

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