Page 492 of His Virgin Romance Series

“It wouldn’t be,” I said. “But sometimes it’s the only thing we have. And that does bother me. Also, he hasn’t told my brother we’re dating yet.”

“Why haven’t you told your brother?” Alani wanted to know.

“Because Seth asked me not to,” I admitted. “He told me that he needed to be the one to tell Jason. And, I understood that. They’ve been friends for years, and it seems right that Jason should hear about our relationship from Seth. But it’s been awhile now, and he still hasn’t mentioned anything to my brother.”

“And that’s bothering you a little, too?”

“Well, it’s like he’s ashamed of us.”

“You don’t really believe that, do you?”

“No, I guess not,” I sighed. “But it does feel like he’s scared… Not of telling Jason specifically, but of announcing to the world that he’s in a committed relationship. Because that would make it real, and once it’s real, then we’re looking at the future and the next step, and I don’t know if Seth is ready for all that.”

Alani listened carefully and nodded. “Can I ask you a personal question?”

“Of course,” I said, smiling slightly.

“Where do you see this going with Seth?”

“I honestly have no idea,” I said.

“Okay then, where do you want this to go?” she asked, amending her question.

I bit my lip. “I love Seth. I want to be with him. I think about the rest of my life, and he’s the only man I can picture myself with.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah,” I said, in a subdued voice.

“And, do you think he feels the same about you?”

“The thing is, there are moments when it feels like he loves me as much as I love him,” I said. “But then there are times when I notice the hesitation in his eyes. I see panic and fear and confusion, and it makes me question his feelings for me. I’ve grown up hearing about Seth’s conquests. I know he’s not good at keeping a long-term girlfriend. And, I guess I’m wondering if I’m just naïve to believe that he would make that kind of change for me.”

“It’s possible.”

“But not probable,” I said.

“Sometimes it just takes the right person to change you,” Alani pointed out.

“See, that just sounds like a line from the movies,” I said. “Real life is more cynical than that.”

“Or maybe it’s just you that’s cynical.”

“Can you blame me?” I laughed. “I need to consider the possibility that Seth is just not a one-woman kind of guy.”

“He’s trying to be,” she pointed out.

“And what if that’s a mistake?” I asked. “What if he’s trying to be something he’s not and that’s the real problem here. What if he’s only trying so hard because he got involved with his best friend’s sister?”

“What do you feel?” Alani asked. “What are your instincts telling you?”

“Can you really even trust your instincts when your emotion is so involved?” I asked. “I’m in love with him, and that is clouding everything else.”

“You’re questioning your whole relationship,” she pointed out. “Which means you’re not completely blind.”

“Just scared,” I said. “And worried.”

“Do you think that maybe you might be overthinking?” she suggested.

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