Page 38 of Tinsel in Telluride

“I didn’t know until the opportunity was thrust into my lap, but yeah,” I admit, tugging on my own reins to keep pace with him.

“Have you told Leigh?”

I wince. “Not exactly.”

I’m pretty sure she would be on the first flight out of here if she was aware of all the things I want with her.

“And you haven’t apologized yet.”

“No.” The word is strained through gritted teeth, the weight of exactly how ass backwards I’ve handled the situation heavy on my chest. “I wasn’t expecting there to be a chance Zach wasn’t mine.”

“Ahhh.” Holt nods, all the pieces clicking together. “You got ahead of yourself again.”

“All in, all the time,” I say with a grin, but it’s a cover for all the times my impulsive nature has bitten me in the ass.

Holt laughs. “We really need to get you to stop sticking your giant ass foot in your mouth.”

“Don’t I know it?” I huff, disheartened. “I just feel like I got a taste of what I could have and then she ripped it away from me.And now I’m having to learn to live with the fact it might not have ever been mine. I want it to be mine.” With each statement, my voice grows louder and Holt glances toward the sleigh to make sure we aren’t being overheard, but I don’t care. I keep going. “How the hell could she do that to me? She’s known where I am. Hell, I saw her this past summer, and she said nothing. We could’ve been a family. I could’ve?—”

Fuck.

My nose and throat burn as I choke on my words. This was not supposed to be a cathartic breakdown in the middle of the woods, but I think Holt knew I needed it. Especially if I’m going to spend the day playing nice with Leigh.

“And you still want to be a family?”

“Yes,” I answer without a second thought. “If Zach is mine, I want to be a part of his life.”

“What about Leigh?”

I consider his question, glancing at the blonde from the corner of my eye.

Do I want Leigh?

Sexually? Yes. Always. I wasn’t kidding when I said she gives the best head I’ve ever received. She’s also got this commanding side that makes my dick hard. I’ve never wanted to explore that with someone, but with her—the things I’d let her do to me are endless.

But beyond that, do I want Leigh?

What do I really know about her?

When she was young, she was feisty but brought sunshine into every room she entered.There wasn’t a trace of the walls she’s erected to keep people out.

Now she’s the CFO of Renegade Hearts and has done amazing things there. She’s smart. Loyal.And she can clearly keep up with Bash and Holt, so she’s got that going for her. Most importantly, she puts Zach first and is an incredible mom.

This is all assuming we can go five minutes without finding a reason to tear each other apart.

Not that I don’t find that incredibly endearing, because I do.

But is that enough to want forever with her?

I know the answer, but admitting it out loud is not something I’m prepared to do. Not when I’m already struggling to protect my heart. Leigh could absolutely be it for me. Mine in every way, shape and form. And the way I’m okay with that scares the shit out of me. Because for every thought of us being a family, there’s one where she doesn’t forgive me, and I’m forced to sit by and watch Zach live a life with parents who can’t coexist.

So I shrug nonchalantly and grin. “I mean, I could do worse.”

“Luca,” Holt deadpans, making it clear I’m not getting out of this with my charming wit or dignity intact.

“Fine,” I grunt. “Possibly.”

It’s not the answer he’s looking for, but it’s not a lie.

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