Page 66 of Tinsel in Telluride

There’s been this kind of we-don’t-talk-about-it aura from, not only Luca, but all the guys too. He’s told me over and over he’s not the guy he was before and made a few comments that make it sound like this is his only family, but none of it adds up. Christmas is for family, and I know damn well he’s got one that didn’t just let him go willingly. Even a Google search didn’t give me any solid answers—believe me, I tried.

Luca’s shoulders fall along with his gaze. For a long time, he contemplates what to say next until he finally looks up through his long lashes and sighs. “I don’t want you to think I don’t want to give you an answer. I do. I’ve owed you the explanation for months—years really—but can we put a pin in this until tonight? You deserve the whole story, and the apology you don’t want me to give. I can’t do that in the five minutes we have before either Zach comes looking for you, or Enzo and Holt need rescuing.”

It’s a fair request, but it doesn’t stop the tense feeling that I might need all the answers before going out with him this evening. I should have let him talk yesterday at the cabin insteadof insisting he hear my side of the story. It was petty, but I needed him to hear me. I needed him to understand I didn’t need his words.

Only now I do.

How am I supposed to set the pace on whatever this is when I don’t have all the facts?

While I can do casual with just about anyone else, there is nothing casual about what’s brewing between me and Luca Donati.

I give a soft nod. “At dinner then.”

“Thank you.”

And because I can’t help myself. I wink and whisper, “Good boy,” as I walk away.

Luca groans and a swarm of drunk bees take flight low in my belly.

What the hell have I gotten myself into?

The rest of the day passes in a Hallmark Christmas blur. One where Luca and I don’t cross paths unless we have to. There’s always at least one of his friends between us, and any time we talk, it’s short and uncharacteristically sweet. None of the guys say anything, but if their arched brows are anything to go on, they know something’s off.

After finishing in town, we take the gondola back up to The Village so Zach can take a nap.I retreat to the guesthouse to get some work done.

Luca's detailed proposal for Monarch Hearts is spread out across the coffee table. I flip through the pages, reading every thoughtfully placed plan.

It’s immaculate.

Incredible.

Honestly, I want to use his proposal as a template for every partnership moving forward. He took my ideas and expanded on them in a way that is not only efficient but allows for growth within the program to include more locations in each city, local events, and partnerships.

If I wasn’t the current face of Renegade Hearts in New York so Willow can run the baseball team, I might ask if I could head up this branch, if only because I want to see how it all plays out.

In every detail, I can see Luca’s unique thoughts. There’s compassion and honesty. Loyalty and ambition. I see him—wearing his heart on his sleeve. The man who jumped in with both feet when he found out Zach might be his. The man who spends Christmas with his best friends, honoring the one they lost. The man who wants to get to know me so he can give my son the family he deserves.

And even though I am desperate to know the rest of the details that made him this way, I am smacked with a gut-wrenching truth.

It doesn’t matter.

It doesn’t. Fucking. Matter.

Of course, I still want to hear it. It’s important for me to know, but this man is who he says he is now. Of all things, it took rifling through this damn proposal for me to see it, but what he said is true. We aren’t the same people we were ten years ago, and the man he is today is a man I want to know.

I don’t know how he did it, but that smooth-talking, obnoxious asshole wormed his way back into my life and heart.

There’s still the question mark of what will happen if we find out he isn’t Zach’s father. But it would be a disservice to Zach, and myself, not to give him a chance.

Right?

My head spins, briefly unable to make sense of it all. There are still so many unknowns, and the need to protect the hearts of me and my son. But then I imagine what could be…

Holidays with the Bucket List boys.

Baseball games with Zach on Luca’s shoulders.

Always having a date for stupid galas Willow doesn’t want to attend.

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