Page 66 of Renegade Rift

“Neither do I.” The words tumble out faster than my mind can register, stopping time between us.

It’s obvious from Ford’s expression that he didn’t expect me to agree. But how could I not? Over the last month helping him organize the apartment we’ve formed a sort of kinship—an understanding.

Maybe what he’s suggesting isn’t a terrible idea. Sure there are still things about him that annoy the daylights out of me, but through his persistence and overly pushy optimism, with maybe a hint of trauma bonding, I’ve found a level of trust with him I haven’t found anywhere else.

It’s not like it would be real. We aren’t actually dating. He’s just teaching me. Helping me to spot the red flags.

I can almost hear Paige’s sarcastic snort in the back of my mind, followed bywhatever you have to tell yourself to sleep at night, friend. You saw him shirtless with that puppy right?

“So you want me to practice on you, in order to be better at dating other people?”

Fords eyes widen. “Well, when you put it like that it sounds bad.”

Sitting forward, I link my hands together as if this were a real-life business proposition and not a half-baked conversation on his couch. “It’s not a terrible idea.”

“It’s not?”

“What would this look like?”

Ford’s jaw tenses, and I can’t tell if he’s happy I’m asking or regrets mentioning it at all. We sit in silence for thirty long seconds before he finally swallows hard and nods. “Three dates.”

“That’s oddly specific.”

“I figure you’d like to get back to finding the love of your life.”

“Pshh.” I chuckle to hide just how uneasy that sentiment makes me. “I’m not sure I’m looking for the love of my life, but go on.”

“We’d have to come up with some ground rules, and I’d need to know exactly what it is you want to learn so I can make the most of our time.”

This feels like a fever dream. Like we’ve changed roles—Ford becoming the logical planner, and me the unhinged chaos ready to jump in with both feet.

Still I consider his question carefully before answering. “Everything.”

Ford’s cheeks tinge pink. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him flustered, but it’s a cute look on him.

He dips his head. “I’m going to need you to be a little more specific, because everything covers a lot of bases.”

I raise a brow in confusion. But then it sets in.

Everything.

He means sex.

“Oh—Oh no, I didn’t mean. Not that—no, I’m not asking you to—I know how to do that.” I swallow hard. This would be embarrassing with anyone other than Ford, but given everything we’ve been through, I don’t feel weird talking with him about this. “I want to be more comfortable in my own skin. I want to be confident. I want to know what to look for and how to spot the red flags.”

I never want to be where I was before.

That particular thought I keep to myself. Based on the lingering looks and scrutinizing glances the past few weeks, there’s no doubt Ford suspects many of the darker moments that transpired between me and Tyler. Even if I haven’t confirmed any of them. And while I want to believe Ford wouldn’t treat me differently because of them, I’m not ready to bet on that.

“I hate to break it to you Juliet, some of those lessons come with time and experience. But I can do my best to help lay the groundwork.”

“So then it’s just coming up with the ground rules.”

He nods, encouraging me to go on.

“Three dates.”

Ford straightens and brings his fist over his heart. Then with all the stoic knight-going-to-save-the-princess-vibes imaginable, he declares,“I vow to plan each of them meticulously to cover the finer points of dating in the quest to help you achieve all the love you deserve.”