Page 124 of Counting On You

Chapter Thirty-Three

Vicky

“Vicky,” Kade speaks my name in his sleep.

He says it softly, as if my name carries a special meaning to him. Even though I don’t want to, I know I’m falling hard for him. Falling for a man whose heart I may never possess. A man who has become my drug.

When did love become so complicated? How can someone go from loving one person to moving on to the next? Since when do I have to resort to lying that I don’t have feelings for him when he’s all I can think about?

People use the word love, but do they understand its meaning? The power behind it? Do they realize that to love means to lose oneself in a tangled forever with no way out?

Love isn’t a drug.

The actual drug is another person’s touch. Being kissed by someone. Granting him access to the pieces of your heart that could destroy you.

Loving Kade feels like I’m falling into a safety net I never want to leave.

Even though Kade Wright is still a player, it feels right to trust him.

Maybe too right.

But he’s the only person who understands. The only one who doesn’t judge me. I might have only known him for a short time, but he’s given me more than anyone else before.

He is everything Bruce isn’t, except Mr. Future, so I call him Mr. Present.

There is this attraction between us. We’re like two polar opposites glued together by the foundation of what we have built.

The program’s supposed to end in two weeks. I dread the day I’ll be forced to return to a life without him.

But a deal’s a deal.

A present with him is all there is, no matter how much I crave a future.

Kade is sleeping next to me, our bodies intertwined between the sheets. My fingers itch to touch him, to brush the dark hair out of his face and kiss him like there’s no tomorrow.

I’m going to miss him. The imminent threat to be without him fills me with dread. I can’t bear the thought of being away from him. Of belonging to his past.

“Remembering you is easy. It’s letting go that’s the hard part,” I whisper.

As though hearing me, he stirs and opens his eyes. He really has the most beautiful eyes—a rich brown, like melted chocolate, like everything that’s good in the world.

“What did you say?” He sits upright and glances around.

“Nothing.” I smile at him. “It’s going to be a hot day.”

“Good thing I got us ice cream.” He catches my confused expression. “I bribed the kitchen staff. It’s in our freezer.”

Our freezer.

He makes it sound like we live together for real, and my heart believes the lie.

Stop it, Vicky. Stop getting invested.

“Want some for breakfast?” Kade asks.

“How could I say no?”

“Yeah, let’s be bold. Let’s break the rules.” He gets up and winks at me. “Don’t run. I’ll be watching the door.”

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