Page 99 of Beautiful Distraction

The end of us.

We’re not going to spend the last night together. Nor theday after.

I’ll leave and I’ll go back to my boring, old life, andhe’ll remain the mystery he is. We’ll both move on. I didn’t expect it to beover so soon, and yet it is.

“Feel free to stay as long as you want. When you’re ready toleave, just leave the keys under the flowerpot on the porch,” Kellan continues,oblivious to my thoughts. It seems so easy for him, as if he’s talking about ashort trip, not the fact that he won’t ever see me again. “The mechanicfinished all repairs on your car early this morning. You have new headlights,the engine’s running, and he’s even done a paint job. You’ll get back homesafely.”

He’s paying me off.

I can’t believe it.

What he’s done is so much worse than throwing a pity checkat me.

I swallow the lump in my throat.

“You didn’t have to,” I say, my voice strangely choked.

He shrugs. “I wanted to. It’s the least I can do afterbumping your car.”

God.

That feels like an eternity ago.

“Mandy should be back tomorrow, right?” Kellan asks,breaking the awkward silence.

“Yeah. I’ll be busy packing up tonight.” I let out a forcedlaugh, the effort making my chest hurt. Everything makes me hurt. My entirebody feels like a truck slammed into it. “She has so much stuff, and becauseher suitcase was too small, she crammed it all in mine.”

His hands trail around my waist, and there’s another short,awkward silence. “I enjoyed my time with you very much.”

His words sound so final, detached and resolute. He might aswell have said, “I enjoyed fucking you,” and it would have made no difference.

“So did I,” I whisper and look up to meet his questioninggaze. I know I shouldn’t ask, and yet I have to know. “Will you visit me in NewYork?”

He regards me, hesitating. “I don’t think I’ll leave Montanafor a while, but when I do, I’ll make sure you’re the first on my list.”

His list.

Yeah, the stupid list of women he’s fucked and wouldn’t minda second helping of.

My eyes feel moist. I break off his embrace and avert mygaze so that he won’t see the turmoil that I’m sure is written across my face.

I’ve always hated saying goodbye. It feels too final, tooheavy. But I knew this day would come after all. Kellan never made a secret outof it. I just didn’t expect it so soon. I just never expected that I’d enjoy mytime with him so much.

Kellan’s lips brush my neck, and as he kisses me, hewhispers against my skin, “I’ll see you soon.”

I want to believe him, but I can’t because I’m not stupid.All men say the same thing to make leaving easier. Maybe they believe it’llsoften the blow that it’s over.

Or maybe they’re just liars and would rather feed a woman’shope than deal with the drama that often accompanies honesty.

Well, there won’t be any drama.

“Yeah.” My body goes rigid as I force a cold smile to mylips. “We’ll stay in touch.”

I close my eyes. He kisses my cheek before he turns andleaves. I don’t follow him back to the house. Instead, I lie down and close myeyes, barely able to hold back the tears I cannot allow myself to shed.

When I head back inside, the house is depressingly empty andquiet.

Kellan’s gone.

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