Page 21 of A Lapse in Time

"Go on now." Carsyn rushed me out of the living room and went back to playing with Nia.

I felt better knowing that her sister would probably come by to help out if she needed it.

After I took my plate to the kitchen and washed it, I headed upstairs to get dressed for the day. When I was done, I kissed my girls goodbye and left the house.

"What's good?"Evander asked as I climbed inside the ring.

From the looks of it, he had just gotten done sparring with someone.

"Everything is better than I thought it would be, but I'm still worried."

Evander wiped his face off and sat down on a small stool. "Ain't nothing wrong with that. What are you worried about, though, specifically?"

I thought about his question as he drank some water. I sat down on the floor next to him. I knew if I could be honest with anybody, it would be him. Evander never judged me for my feelings about anything. In the same way, I never judged him.

I rubbed my hand down my face. "I don't even know exactly. Some days, I feel like Carsyn will wake up and not like me or something and leave me."

Evander laughed and sucked his teeth. "Man, what? You, me, and the rest of the world know Carsyn ain't leaving you." He laughed again.

I pushed him hard enough to almost knock him off the stool. "I'm being for real, E."

He cleared his throat and got serious. "Damn, my bad, cuz. Why do you feel like that, though?"

"Because Carsyn doesn't remember anything about our relationship. I've been answering questions about us, but what if this new her realizes she wants different things in life? What if she loses interest in me?"

My chest tightened at the thought of Carsyn losing feelings for me. I didn't think it was possible, but what if she didn't want to be a mother anymore? That would crush Nia and me, but Nia the most. I had to shake that thought off.

"You're going too far into your head, Noah. I understand things are different, and your feelings are valid. Has Carsyn acted like she doesn't like you since she's been home?"

"Not at all. She's actually been more receptive to me than I thought she would be. She and Nia have been bonding with no problems either. I just don't know."

Evander patted my shoulder. "I think you are worrying for nothing. It may be a slow process, but I'm sure y'all will be good. Has she said anything about boxing?"

"No. Like, she remembers her and her pops watching fights and shit, but nothing about her career."

I'd told Carsyn about her career and showed her pictures, but she didn't seem at all interested. I didn't want to push her, though, so I hadn't brought it up in a few days.

"There's a match tomorrow night. Maybe you can bring her through. It might help," Evander suggested.

I rubbed my beard and thought about it. Bringing Carsyn to a boxing match could be a good thing, or that shit could go very badly. It was something I had to think about.

"That might not be a bad idea. Let me think about it and see how she feels about it. Either way, I'll let you know. What's going on with you?"

"You know me." He smirked. “I met this chick, but I don’t know too much about her yet.”

“Oh yeah. Where you meet her?”

I listened to him tell me about how he met the woman at the smoothie shop down the street from the gym. She sounded like she was cool. Maybe she would be able to tame his ass a little.

I stayedat the gym for two hours, talking and sparring with my cousin. It felt good to get out of the house, but I missed my girls, so I headed back home.

When I got in the car, I called Carsyn.

"Hey, Care Bear. Were you sleeping?"

"Yeah, Nia and I built forts in the living room, and we both fell asleep," she whispered.

"My bad. I didn't mean to wake you."