Page 29 of A Lapse in Time

Noah glanced back at Nia, then at me. "I know she's sleeping, but we can come in and wait with you if you need me to."

"No. I can do this." I leaned over the console and kissed him.

I looked back at Nia again. I had to do this for the two of them, especially Nia. I also needed to do this for myself. I was afraid of eventually slipping into depression because I no longer knew who I was. I needed to figure it out so I could be a great mother and wife. Noah had been so patient and understanding, and he deserved a wife who could fully love him the way he loved me.

"Yes, you can."

I squared my shoulders and tucked my apprehension away. I opened the door and exited the car. Noah stayed parked until I reached the door and waved at him. I watched him pull off, then went to the front desk to check-in.

It felt like my heart would beat through my shirt with how hard it thumped.

"Hi, I have an appointment. I'm Carsyn Ross."

"Hi, yes. Let me grab the paperwork for you to fill out and let Dr. Mitchell know you are here."

I watched her put a few papers on a clipboard and grab a pen out of a cup before she passed it to me.

"Thank you." I walked away from the desk and found a seat to sit in.

Only one other person was in the waiting room, and she paid me no mind.

A friend of Noah's highly recommended Dr. Mitchell. He used to play for the Sweetwater Hills Hurricanes, and his wife attended therapy with Dr. Mitchell, which helped her a lot. I was glad that she had experience with other public figures. She knew how important discretion was. It was her job, but some people would give up confidential information for a dollar.

"Mrs. Ross."

I looked up when I heard my name called.

"Hi." I stood from the seat and walked toward the woman.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Mitchell. Let's go to my office. You can drop the paperwork off at the desk if you are done."

I nodded, then put the clipboard on the desk and followed behind Dr. Mitchell. I was surprised she came out and got me, and not some assistant or something.

"Have a seat and make yourself comfortable," she advised as she sat down in a chair that faced a dark gray couch and another chair that was similar to the one she sat in. There were also a couple of beanbags in the corner.

I decided to sit on the couch because it looked so comfortable. There was a hint of lavender in the air.

"Before we get started, let me give a little information about myself. I have two teenage boys. I've been in practice for almostfifteen years. I have a doctorate in psychology, and I've done extensive mental health courses and classes. I've also worked with other high-profile celebrities and athletes. Regardless of who you are, your privacy is always respected, but I wanted to add that last part in there just in case. Now, tell me, what brings you in today?"

Dr. Mitchell picked up a pad that was on the table next to her. She also put on a pair of glasses and picked up her pen.

I sat across from her, spinning my wedding band. I wasn't sure where to begin.

"I can tell you are nervous, and that's understandable. Take your time and just start from wherever you feel comfortable."

I took a deep breath and focused on why I was there in the first place. I stopped messing with my ring and put my hands in my lap.

"I'm here because my husband suggested it after I had a panic attack a few nights ago."

"Let's start there. What do you think happened to trigger that type of reaction?"

"We were at a boxing match, and it bothered me when the guy got hit in the head. I'm not sure if you are familiar with my story or not, but I have retrograde amnesia from being hit in the head too hard."

I was positive my story had been on the sports channels and all over social media, so I would be surprised if she didn't know. I appreciated her for not bringing it up.

"Yes, I'm familiar with it. How did it make you feel seeing that?"

I blew air from between my lips and twisted my ring again.

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