Page 43 of Secrets & Curses of Fate

“I do not think I will know what happiness feels like again until the day you find me. I don’t understand how the realm continues to go forward when you are not in it. But maybe it is only my world that ended when you did.”

I leaned down and kissed his forehead before touching his soft hair one last time.

“I love you more, and I am still all in. I am waiting for you."

I stepped backward, and it was the hardest thing I had ever done. Penelope grabbed my hand as a man in all black lifted the heavy wooden lid to Haden’s coffin and set it in place with a final thud. He would never feel the sun again. The coffin was slowly lowered into the grave they had dug for him. I closed my eyes when they began shoveling the dirt in the hole. He would be in the dark, alone, and that made me feel terrible. Logically, I knew that he didn’t know this. He was dead. But I still worried he would be scared. Everyone else turned to leave, but I didn’t; I couldn’t.

“Ardella, do you want us to stay?” Henry asked.

“No, I will see you guys later,” I whispered. They hesitated, but I turned to them. “I’ll be alright.”

They nodded but did not seem convinced. I stood at his grave long after they finished burying him, not able to find the strength to walk away. Instead, I sat down and sighed heavily as I stared at the pile of dirt that stood between us. When night fell, I could not bring myself to leave him alone in the dark. I laid down next to him.

“It’s alright, Haden. You aren’t alone. I am here.”

I rested my hand on the dirt and closed my eyes.

“Oh, Ardella,” I heard Penelope whisper from nearby.?

I turned to look at her from where I lay. She came and sat by me, her hand rubbing my back softly.

“I’m sorry,” I told her as silent tears fell down my cheeks.

“What for?”

“You are grieving a son, but you keep trying to make me feel better. You should be at home with your family.”

Penelope let out a soft sigh as she thought about my words.

“You are our family, and you don’t have to apologize for grieving. We all are missing a brother, a friend, a son, but you are grieving the man you thought you had forever with. I can’t imagine that kind of pain.”

I sat up and moved next to her.

“We tried to give Haden and Holden good lives growing up, and I think we did that.” Penelope smiled softly. “But I don’t think Haden was truly living until you came along. He was so happy, Ardella. You made him so happy, and I know that no one else could have brought that out of him.”?

“He made me happy, too,” I whispered. “So much that I do not know what I am supposed to do now. How can I just keep living like my heart and soul aren’t buried under this pile of dirt?” I turned to her, and she wiped the tears from my cheeks. “I keep thinking that he will be alone if I leave. Or maybe it is that I will be alone if I leave him here.”?

“You will always have us.”?

But I won’t have him.?

“Thank you.” I leaned my head on her shoulder, “for giving me Haden, even if it was not long enough.”?

Penelope wrapped her arm around my shoulder and held me tightly.

?????????

“Dells, what is wrong?” Mikel asked as I lay in bed. “You haven’t left your bed in months, and you haven’t talked to me. Please, tell me how I can help you.”?

I stared at Mikel and knew I couldn’t tell him the whole truth because he was the God of Judgment, and I broke the laws of the gods to try and save Haden. But I needed my brother—my best friend.

“I fell in love with a man who was not my mate," I confessed.

Mikel looked at me and frowned. “That’s impossible.”

“And then he was murdered,” I said.

I tried to find those responsible for his death, but I couldn't find any trace of them.

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