Page 26 of Work with Me

“You might as well tellme about it. I’ll find out from Cooper. Or Jay.” Jamila neatly speared a thin slice of chicken and a folded piece of lettuce, popped the bite into her mouth, and stared me down as she chewed.

I poked my fork into my salad and moved a cube of pickled beet into a corner. Gross. My stomach was too knotted to eat, so I’d ordered what Jamila had.

She was right. Not about the disgusting beet salad, but that I was wasting an opportunity with my mentor if I didn’t talk this through with her.

“We screwed up.Iscrewed up. We had nothing to show Cooper this morning. One of the programmers introduced a bug over the weekend that stopped the compile. Not only his module. The whole thing. And it’s my fault.”

“How is that your fault?”

I stabbed a tomato like it was Jackson Jones’s face. “I tried to create a collaborative culture. I paired everyone up. But when Jackson went all cowboy-coder on me and started working solo, I didn’t say anything. I didn’t discipline him. I ignored it. Trying to get along, you know? And so Ty—the other programmer thought he could do the same thing. Surprise us all with new functionality. Impress Jackson and Cooper.”

“Honey, you can’t take the blame for that.” She tapped her plum-tipped fingers on the tablecloth in front of my plate to draw my gaze. “That’s not your fault.”

“My job is to lead. To establish norms. To ensure everyone follows the rules.”

Jamila shook her head. “Girl, you should know better than that. In their heads, programmers are half Bruce Willis inDie Hardand half Gandalf. They’re artists who know everything. Trying to get them going in the same direction is like herding cats or rattlesnakes. Or rattlesnake-headed cats.”

“I know. And yet I told Cooper Fallon I could do it.”

“You can. It’ll just take time.”

Remembering the expression on his face in this morning’s failed demo sent a shiver down my spine. And then his terse, angry words in his office sent a second shudder back up. “I don’t know how much more time I have. Cooper was pretty disappointed.” An understatement. He’d ripped me a new one, even questioned my qualifications.

And the worst part was that for a second, I’d considered letting Jackson take the blame. My heart had leapt when he’d stood and started to speak. I was almost certain he’d been about to tell Cooper he’d encouraged Tyler in his cowboy coding. But even if he was, I didn’t want Jackson to ride to my rescue. Couldn’t want that. I could only rely on myself. So I’d spoken right over him.

Jamila waved off my words. “Cooper’s all wind and no rain.”

I raised my eyebrows. “You’re saying he’s a big softy under all the ice?”

She snorted. “I didnotsay that. He’ll do anything for his friends, but everyone else is either a tool or an obstacle to him. He knows you’ll do your job and turn it around.”

“You’ve told me no less than a dozen times that as women in a male-dominated field, we have to work harder, be faster, show better results. I’m”—not afraid, I wouldn’t admit that—“concerned I’m not going to get a second chance. Not like Jackson will.”

“In Cooper’s mind, Jay can do no wrong. You’re right that he’ll get limitless chances and you won’t. But you’ve got this. I have faith in you. Or I wouldn’t have recommended you in the first place.”

Jamila still believed in me. And that meant a lot. She was the smartest person I’d ever met. She’d gone from an underfunded public school in East Austin to Stanford University. She hadn’t bothered with any of the job offers she’d been presented with months before graduation; instead, she’d taken her idea for an app and a small inheritance and built her own company. Jamila’s face had filled the cover of one of the business magazines in the waiting room during Noah’s check-up last week.

If she thought I could do it, it was worth another try.

“Thanks, Jamila. For both the recommendation and your support. I won’t let you down.”

“You’d never let me down, even if you quit today.” She crunched into a carrot. “And I know you won’t let yourself down. Or Noah. How’s that adorable ankle-biter?”

Noah.Telling her about his broken arm reminded me of the doctor’s bill that had arrived the day before. It was exactly the amount Dr. Ruiz’s assistant had told me, but seeing that comma made it real. Even if I wanted to chicken out of the project, I couldn’t. I had bills to pay.

Besides, what kind of example would I be setting if I gave up two weeks into my first consulting gig? If I gave up, I’d never get another opportunity like this. I needed Cooper’s recommendation. I had to try harder. Like the superhero from the movie, I had to get back up even after today had knocked me down.

After lunch, when I walked Jamila to Cooper’s office, I gave him my brightest smile. “I’ll set up that remote demo, Mr. Fallon. You’ll see our progress by the end of the week.”

He didn’t smile back or ask me to call him Cooper. “I’m counting on it,” was all he said.

I trudged back to our team’s workspace. We’d find that bug, we’d knock Cooper Fallon’s socks off in our demo, and I’d earn that damned testimonial.

And it didn’t matter that I thought for a second Jackson Jones might stand up for me. Or that I couldn’t get his scent out of my nostrils even after I left the office. He was a distraction, an extra challenge, nothing more. I couldn’t let him get in the way of my success on this project. And I had to succeed for Noah. For Jamila. And for myself.

11

JACKSON

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