“Then you should pick me up and throw me out because it’s the only way I’m leaving this bed.” He isn’t thinking straight. It’s two in the morning, and he’ll get anxious when he realizes I’ll take the subway. Then he’ll hail a cab. Then he’ll worry about me getting into my building. Then he’ll come with me. Trust me. This happened before. It’s best I stay in place. “And I won’t let you dress me, so if you don’t mind chucking a naked chick out of your place, go for it. I bet the security cams will get some footage of that, too, and I’ll have to wake up Ivy. She can be cranky if she doesn’t get eight hours.”
He frowns. “I’m serious. You can’t control me with sex.”
I yawn again and pat the place beside me. It’s a good bed. Very comfy and warm. “I’m not trying to control you, babe. I’m trying to get you back into bed so you can get some sleep. You have a design meeting about the ballroom in the morning, and I’m installing crown molding. Gotta be sharp.”
“I have to go to Europe. I’m going to find a flight tomorrow.”
The thought of him going to see her makes my heart ache, but probably not for the reasons he thinks. “Then you should definitely get some sleep.”
“Are you listening to a word I say?” Reid asks, obviously exasperated.
I wish there was an easier way to do this, but I think Reid needs to understand he can’t move me. “Of course, but you’re not saying anything that makes sense. Hence the need for sleep.”
“Me sleeping with you won’t change the fact that I’m going to Europe to meet with Britta.” His gaze turns steely, and I realize we’ve come to the nasty part of this drama we’re playing out. This is when he makes what he thinks is his big play to save me. “I’ve been lying to you. You were right back in Ralavia. I’m in love with her. When she came to see me that night, we made love and talked about how we could fuck with you. We came up with this whole plan to draw you in and make you believe. I’m sorry. This is just what we do. We play games. It’s exciting.”
I can’t help but smile. He’s so bad at this. “Ah, we’re going the Cruel Intentions route.”
He winces. “It’s Dangerous Liaisons, Harper. One is a brilliant play and the other is for teenagers. But I suppose you could say it’s an inspiration. Wealthy, bored people like to play games.”
I’ve started to wonder about the wealthy part, but I leave that for another day. “Yeah, you look like you’re having a ton of fun.”
He’s back to pacing, every lean line of his body tight with anxiety. “Whatever you believe, understand that I am going to see her. I’ll leave the project we both love, the one we’re both committed to, for her.”
“Jer and I will hold down the fort, sir,” I vow.
He ignores my jaunty salute. “I’ll take her places I would never take you. Fancy places. Expensive places.”
I groan at the thought. “Good. CeCe already makes us dress up when she takes us out. She thinks denim is for mountain people. What are mountain people and how do I become one because I think they get to wear boots? Those heels are torture devices. I’m with Ivy. I like a food truck.”
His hands are clenched around the bed posts. “I’ll be photographed with her. You’ll have to see it online. You’ll read about our love story.”
That is where he’s wrong. I’m perfectly happy to stop stalking him online. It leads to hurt feelings and does no good. “I’m not much of a reader of magazines. Now a good romance is another story. If she can get Jen Armentrout or Kristen Ashley to write it, I’ll have to rethink my stance.”
He sighs and stops and plays what is likely his last card. “Harper, I won’t ever marry you.”
I sit up. “See, I knew I should have taken you up on it this afternoon.”
“This is not a time to joke,” he scolds. “She will always be in my life. She will be known as the love of my life, and for that reason alone you need to leave.”
We’re back to this. I don’t bother with the sheet. I let it pool around my waist, and for a man who claims he loves that supermodel, his eyes go right to my chest. “I’d rather stay. Reid, I care about you. I think I’m falling in love with you. I don’t know what’s happening with her. I do know she’s got something she’s holding over your head and it likely has to do with your brother.”
Reid’s eyes narrow. “Why the hell would you say that?”
“Because if it was about you this would be over. You would never allow her to put you in a corner over something that embarrassed you or hurt only you. You would put it out there and take whatever happened. But you will go to the ends of the earth for him. So here’s what’s going to happen. Jeremiah is going to figure this out, and he’ll do the right thing in the end. I don’t know what you’re both hiding, but I think he’s almost there and when he proves he loves you, too, I’ll be waiting. You say you’re not going to marry me. If you don’t, that’s okay. If you don’t because you don’t love me and you think someone else will make you happier than I can, then it’s good. But if it’s because some chick in Sweden is blackmailing you, I’m not okay with it.”
He stares at me for a moment. “I don’t understand you.”
“I know. I don’t think I understood until earlier today. I think this feeling I have for you is more important than being loved by you. Your love isn’t something I can control, but I can decide how I want to treat you, how I want to honor this feeling inside me that only you have ever brought out. You think we’re alike because we had fairly awful parents, but I had these amazing friends. I wasn’t responsible for them. We were equals. Ivy and Anika… They’re my touchstones, and I would never leave them and they wouldn’t leave me. Reid, I won’t leave you alone in this. You don’t have to ever tell me what happened between you and Britta if you don’t want to. You don’t have to marry me and promise to love me forever. I’ll still be your friend if I can’t be your lover. Damn. I think I figured out what love is. So odd. Turns out love is just putting someone ahead of you not because you were taught to or because you’re obligated. You do it because their happiness is the most important thing.”
He’s silent, and for a moment I think he’s going to find a way to kick me out.
Then he moves to the bed. He shuts off the light and crawls in beside me, his arms wrapping around me. He holds me close and I feel something wet against my cheek. My heart threatens to break.
“I can’t tell you because I promised my brother,” he whispers. “But I want to because I’m almost at the end. I can’t pay her off much longer.”
I kiss the top of his head. “Then we’ll figure out another way. No matter what, I’m with you.”
I hold him until we both fall asleep.