Page 29 of Brother In Arms

“Lot lizard, something our piece of shit foster daddy just loved reminding us about on the regular.”

“I don’t know what that means…” she said quietly and I could tell it bothered her to ask.

“A lot lizard is a hooker at a truck stop. That’s how Nox and I came to be the medical marvels we are today.”

“Medical marvels?”

“We’re twins, but we don’t share the same daddy.” I let her think about that for a while. Finally she gave a little startled ‘oh!’ I nodded, “Yeah.”

“So you have no idea who your fathers are then?”

“Just what they sort of look like and that they drove truck for a living. That’s about it.”

“Oh my god, I don’t know if I could even imagine such a thing.”

“Not gonna sugar coat shit because I ain’t Willy Wonka, there aren’t many kids that had it worse than us comin’ up. Usually the ones that did, well, they didn’t make it.”

“I still don’t understand what that has to do with joining a motorcycle gang.”

“Club.”

“Yeah, but –“

“No buts, it’s a club, a brotherhood that’s given us everything that the life you citizen motherfuckers scorned us for. I’m not gonna lie to you. There was more ‘n one time when I was as young as six or seven when I wished our mamma had done the right thing and aborted us before we’d ever come to term.”

“That’s horrible!” she cried, sitting up and staring down at me aghast.

“That’s the truth of it,” I said. “These fuckin’ red states and their pro-life bullshit. Where are they once kids like me and my brothers are born? Oh yeah, that’s right, screamin’ in our mom’s faces to get a job, and to stop moochin’ off their precious system… Well, my mom had a job, the only one she could get to feed her drug habit that she took on to forget how shitty her life was. Only problem was, she was either too high or didn’t have access to birth control, and so here I am.”

She sat there staring at me, chewing her lip, I hated the pity in her eyes, but it was to be expected. Not a lot of human beings out there could listen to my story and not be moved to pity. The ones that weren’t were typically men or women like me who knew what it was like, or the real monsters that people needed to be afraid of but rarely ever saw them for who they were until it was too late. People like my foster parents, real pieces of shit.

“So the club is what? A way to get back at everyone?”

I laughed, “That’s right where all you citizens go, right from the get go, every damn one of you. You’re about as smart as you are sexy, Bailey. I need you to use those smarts and think about it.”

She blushed and averted her gaze out over the grass to the sound of the nearby river. Finally her shoulders dropped and she sighed, “A place to belong?” she asked finally.

“Bingo.”

“I still don’t quite understand.”

“My brothers have my back and I have theirs. I’m not just talkin’ my twin or my foster brothers. I’m talkin’ men like Dragon and Dray. They had family come callin’ and by all rights, the way your mamma, and yeah by default even you, have treated ‘em they had every reason to tell y’all to fuck off, but did they?”

“No.”

“Did I?”

“No.”

“That’s the point of the club. We just don’t really have time to try and live up to and follow the rules of a society that doesn’t give a good goddamn about us. Y’all have your preconceived notions and we could give a fuck less about correcting your ignorant asses.”

“Wouldn’t it make life easier if you did?”

“Baby, since when has life ever been easy for a man like me?”

She twisted her lips to keep from smiling and picked at the grass by her hip. She looked thoughtful, and finally said, “You know it’s not all sunshine and roses on this side of the fence either, don’t you?”

I put my hands behind my head and stared at the sky, “There’s this saying that comes to mind when you said that just now. ‘The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence…’” I said.