Page 38 of Bourbon & Blood

I got off my bike, and he pushed off from the doorway, turning sideways in it, to let me by and following me back to my office.

I took a seat at my desk and he dropped into the seat across from it.

“So, where’s the fire at?” he asked and let out a gusty sigh.

“She’s home. I walked her there.”

“She? She who?” he asked, his eyes flashing and the calculations beginning to tick behind his eyes.

I told him everything – about Alina, about the promise I’d made and what I’d asked for in exchange and he listened.

“Shit howdy, that’s a lot,” he said and huffed a bit of an incredulous laugh. Then his eyes flicked back to mine and he said, “I’m proud of you, brother. It’s not our usual thing and I don’t suppose we could really ask the rest of the brothers to pitch in over much, seein’ as they get no benefit really, but yeah, you can count on me. I’ll help. The rest of ‘em, we gotta leave it up to them – you know? We don’t need no echoes of Ruth around here. That was all around a bad situation.”

I nodded, listening to his council, pausing, considering it, and finally, I nodded again.

He was right. It was shit like I was asking that’d made the things go down like they had – selfish, but mildly so at first, devolving into a tyrannical regime. Treating the lot of us like we was at his beck and call, and we couldn’t and wouldn’t stand for that. Thus brothers smarter than Ruth – namely Hex and yeah, even myself, had started to plot against him. This life was about bein’ free of a tyrannical system, not about trading one for another.

That’s what’d got Ruth in the end. The club had divided, and heads had needed to roll. He’d been adding brothers left right and center for a while, boasting big damn numbers, even numbers, which had gone against the fuckin’ bylaws. Throwin’ the rules and any sense of caution to the wind; and why?

Because Ruth had dipped into the party favors just a little too fuckin’ much and had lost his way. Couldn’t be reasoned with to put the fuckin’ nose candy down. Had found his self in a perpetual cycle of relying on uppers, then downers, then uppers again until he’d lost his fuckin’ mind and there weren’t no ability to reason with the fucker.

I’d felt some guilt over that. Over lettin’ the man lose his way so thoroughly. I think we’d all fallen into the trap of belivin’ Ruth’s bullshit that he was fine and had shit in hand. By the time it was obvious he didn’t? Well, shit was just too late an’ several other brothers were addicted too, yo the point they took Ruth’s side and had cozied up to the wrong fuckin’ bear.

We were twenty-three, and me and Saint had taken us down to eight with Hex’s careful and precise guidance. It’d been a bloody and fucked-up civil war. One we’d kept private for the most part; and it’d scarred every last one of us that’d wound up left and loyal to the colors over the individual men that’d wore ‘em.

I’d had to kill friends and brothers; people I’d liked, all in a bid to protect the sanctity of the club. There were no loyalties tested to these colors like mine had been, and I’d always and forever remained true to the Voodoo Bastards. Now that I sat at the head of its table – It took that loyalty and deference to a whole new level and I felt like this was some kind of moment of truth, you know? That it was time to find out if these colors were going to be loyal back to me or not.

I knew what I was asking here was abigask… just as I knew it could be something that wastoo big, but there was only one way to find that out, and closed mouths didn’t get fed.

Hex cocked his head and said, “Y’know, the only reason I say this even needs to be put to a vote is the way I see it… too long have decisions been made by leadership and leadership alone in this club. Which is how we arrived in the situation we did with Ruth and his power-hungry bullshit in the first place.” He sighed and put his boot heels up on the edge of the desk.

“I thought then, and I still think now, that we was lookin’ at things all wrong, or that Ruth certainly was. I wanna make sure you an’ I don’t get set in the ways of before... that we don’t fall into the same patterns for the sake of familiarity or make the same damn mistakes. Change came fast, but it ain’t come easy,” he said. “Let’s call church and put it to a vote. Even if the rest of the boys say nay, you know you got me.”

I nodded. It was the best idea, but it was also a little frightening. I mean, I guess there wasn’t any way faster to find out if your brothers liked you or not.

“Let’s do that,” I agreed, even though a knot of uneasy dread took up residence in my chest.

Could I do what my little Alina asked on my own?

Yes.

Would it be much faster and a fuckload easier if my brothers were involved, and likelier with a better outcome?

Absolutely yes…

“You look spooked,” Hex said, eyeing me critically. “I ain’t never seen you look spooked before in my life. Just what you feel like you got ridin’ on this?” he demanded.

I leveled my brother with my gaze and told him the fuckin’ stark truth of it.

“Feels like everything,” I said.

“I didn’t realize you were in so deep over that girl,” he said. “What’s it about her?”

“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “I know I certainly don’t deserve something as pure or sweet – but now I’ve got my chance and failure just doesn’t feel like an option.”

He nodded and looked contemplative.

“You don’t think you got a shot with the rest of the boys?” he asked, but he kept his face neutral. I knew the look. It was the same one he got when his curiosity was piqued and he felt like gathering information to solve some kind of a puzzle.

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