Page 12 of Moonshine Lullabies

“Yeah, I’m good,” he said, and I hoped my smile appeared more convincing than it felt. To me, it felt brittle and thin.

He smiled back, and I asked him, “You good to stay in your room or do you want to stay in here?”

“I can stay in my room,” he said, and it broke my heart even as I swear it swelled with pride.

“Okay, baby.”

He hit the side of the doorframe with the heel of his hand twice and took a deep breath. I thought he was going to slip off to his room with nothing further but he pleasantly surprised me by coming in and leaning down to hug me.

I hugged him tight, and he said, “I’m glad you’re alright.”

“Me too, kiddo. Me too.”

I gave him a squeeze and he let go. I had to watch my baby grow up a lot more. He smiled at me and waved and said, “I love you, Mom.”

“I love you, too,” I told him. I had to heave a sigh when he slipped out my door and I heard his door shut.

I could hear Collier faintly talking out in the living room, and I got to my feet and dumped the broken pieces of one of the first skulls that I’d carved, into the trash in the corner. My room was back to rights from where the men had thrown things around, my closet door closed on its broken closet rod and the mess of clothes sliding off into the bottom.

I was sure John-Paul’s room was a wild mess, but it was his to clean up.

I was just shutting the armoire I had against one wall when a light knock fell at the edge of my door. I turned and the line of sight between me and Collier was electric for just a moment. Those light blue eyes of his skated over me head to toe and there wasn’t anything sexual at all about it, and yet…

…and yet…

I hugged myself and asked him, “You need something?”

He shook his head.

“Just wanted to check on you.” He tore his eyes from mine almost reluctantly and looked around my room. “It’s nice in here. I like the vibe.”

“What? Swamp Woman?” I asked. I glanced up to the potted plant, the vines of it trailing off the top of my armoire. It’d been knocked off and there was still some dirt in the area rug beneath my bed. I would vacuum it up tomorrow.

He gave me a crooked smile and said, “I like the skulls.” I had quite a few of them hanging on the walls in here, all carved and inlaid with semi-precious stones.

“Thanks, I carved ‘em myself.”

He looked impressed and said, “I’d like to see how you do that sometime.”

I raised an eyebrow at that. Not the usual reaction I got.

“You need anything?” he asked.

“Maybe some aspirin or somethin’,” I answered.

“Where’s it at?” he asked.

I huffed a laugh and said, “I can get it.” I shook my head.

“No, go on and get yourself into bed. I’ll get it for you. You want some tea or something? Saw an electric kettle in the kitchen.”

I swallowed hard and decided what the fuck, why not?

“Yeah, there’s some stuff in glass jars on the countertop. Looseleaf. The jars are labeled, just… surprise me.”

He gave a nod, and hand clutching his fist absentmindedly, he backed out of my room and went on down the hall.

I mean, I’d never had anyone do anything nice for me without the catch of wanting in my pants attached. I sighed, tired under the weight of that constant and exhausting thing. I honestly didn’t think this was any different but hey, I’d take it until the other proverbial shoe dropped to ruin it.

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