He’d been free for a while, met Angelo, thought he’d found someone he could fall in love with. Then Austin had threatened Angelo, and Nat had gone back to him.
“Sometimes with a narcissistic person,” Zack said gently, “breaking up with them can be like throwing a boomerang. It comes back, whether you want it to or not.”
“Exactly. This past winter, I took him back. But things just got worse and worse, and I honestly felt like everyone in my life was in danger because of me, so I left it all behind.”
Zack’s mouth twisted into a sad frown. “I’m so sorry you didn’t have anyone to help you, but I’m so proud of you for leaving. For saying enough, instead of staying with him.”
“It’s the only thing I’m kind of proud of myself for.” He’d rather sleep on a thousand dirty, damp streets than wake up another morning, hung over from drugs and alcohol, body so sore from sex he could barely crawl to the bathroom to piss. Selling his body for money Austin rarely lavished on Nat, save the occasional fancy dinner out. “It was either leave or kill myself, and I wasn’t ready to die.”
“I’m glad.” Zack reached out again to squeeze his knee, and Nat absorbed the support in that brief touch. “You proved to yourself and your ex just how strong of a person you are, Nat. You’re a survivor, and the world still needs you in it.”
“Thank you.” It was wonderful hearing someone else affirm the choice Nat had made that night, when everything had been too heavy, too cold, too distant from any form of hope. If he’d learned anything from his childhood, it was that he was a goddamn survivor, not a quitter.
“If I ask, you probably won’t tell me his name, will you?”
“No, I won’t, because I don’t need you to fight my battles, or go give him a warning.” He didn’t want Zack on Austin’s radar.
Zack grunted. “Fine. But I want you to promise me something, and it’s for our safety. Yours, mine and Chase’s.”
“What?”
“If this ex does contact you again, or if you happen to run into him on the street, you will tell me about it. I once knew someone with a personality very similar to your ex, and he ended up becoming quite violent before he was stopped. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
Or to bring a possibly crazy, violent guy into my or Chase’s life.He didn’t have to say it for Nat to hear it.
“I promise,” Nat said. “So far, I’ve been lucky. I admit, I was terrified when I went to Neighborhood Shindig last weekend. I expected to see him pop around every corner, or sneak up behind me. But Reynolds is a pretty big city, and it’s easy enough to avoid his favorite places.”
“What about the Tim’s reopening on Friday?”
Nat shrugged, insides squirrelly at the idea of a packed bar full of people who likely knew Austin. Or at least, knew of him, depending on their proclivities. “Part of me wants to go. I loved working there. I miss the people. But I’m terrified he’ll be there.”
“What if we go together?”
“It’s Friday night. You have dinner service.”
“I do, but I’ll be done by eleven. We can go afterward. If nothing else, to put in an appearance and wish the owners all the future luck with the remodeled bar.”
Nat chewed on that offer. Zack would have already worked a long day, and probably wouldn’t want to stay for very long. It was the perfect excuse for Nat to dip in, say hello, maybe have a drink, and then leave with his ride. And if, on the slim chance they did run into Austin, Nat wouldn’t be alone. “Okay, that sounds good. Do you think Chase will want to come?”
“Will he want to? Most certainly. Will he be awake enough that late? Probably not, but I’ll still invite him.”
“All right. Good, then let’s do that.”
“Excellent.” Zack surprised him by cracking a big yawn that made his jaw pop. “Ugh, sorry about that.”
“It’s fine, it’s the middle of the night. I think, um, I’m ready to try going back to sleep. I know I keep thanking you, Zack, but I mean it. Thank you.”
“You are very welcome.” Zack slid off the bed and padded to his bedroom door. Glanced back over his shoulder, his expression difficult to see in the dim light. “Better dreams.”
“You too. Good night.”
“Good night.”
Nat situated his covers and tucked himself back in. Maybe in the morning light, he’d regret sharing so much with Zack. Regret not allowing the kiss Zack had obviously wanted to give him. Regret not allowing physical comfort when offered. He might regret it all.
But he doubted it.
CHAPTERSEVEN