Page 72 of The Witch Queen

When I arrive in the cave, I barely make it two steps before I’m screaming in fury. My wrath repeats back to me in hollow echoes. I scream again, trying to release the pent-up frustration of the last few hours, the last few months, my entire life. There’s so much buried inside of me, so much hurt and longing and need, that I feel like I’m going to explode. I scream and scream into the void, desperately seeking relief. When that doesn’t help, I collapse in anguish, all the emotions and fears I’d been pushing down for so long leaking out of me. My pulse races, my breathing quickens. I try to maintain control of the aether coursing through my blood, but it demands to be released. With a roar, I unleash myself.

Energy erupts in arcs from my body, shaking the cave. Rocks crash down around me, but a shield of light I instinctively wrap around myself protects me from the falling debris. Moss expands and covers an entire wall, then the ceiling. Water droplets gather into massive orbs before falling to the ground with splashes that soak everything around me. A wind whips through the cavern, churning up dust and rocks that orbit my light shield. I think I glimpse lightning forking across the tall ceiling but am so absorbed by my pain and grief that I can’t say for sure. Like so many times before, my magic feels heavy, like if I make the wrong move, it will completely consume me. I walk the precipice of madness, one heartbeat away from lettingLaureldisappear. I’m not sure who would take her place behind my eyes.

I exist in that liminal state. Time doesn’t pass. There will be no beginning or end to my desperation. Tears stream out of my eyes before collapsing on the ground in a puddle.

Eventually, I burn myself out. The magic falters, then stops altogether. I lie down on my side, curl in on myself, and stare out at the darkness that surrounds me, wishing that I could just disappear.

Hawthorne

The origin of the myth of fae mates is unknown. Most scholars agree it is unlikely there is one singular origin story that inspires this longstanding legend. Like most fables, it is an amalgamation of several tales that over time converged into one story. The nuances of each tale are, unfortunately, lost to history.

The Legends of the Fae, Volume III

She left. She left, and I don’t know how to find her.My mate left. My Mate. Mate.

I pace across the training room, barely coherent. I need to see her, need to touch her.Claim her.Snippets of our conversation weave in and out of my consciousness. I replay her face right before she disappeared. Grief, fear, rage. It’s so at odds with how I felt in that same moment that I’m lost. I don’t understand what’s happened, how this could’ve gone so wrong.

Fury and fear and joy bring a deep uneasiness to my gut. My blood races. Her scent lingers in the room, and I can’t get enough of it. I take a deep inhale, breathing in her smell of lilac and mint. It calms me, allows me to focus. I need to find her. I have to convince her that there isnothingbetween Silene and me, even though I’ve already assured her of that. I have to somehow find a way to get her to overlook who my father is.I. Have. To.

With one last inhale, I leave the training room to seek her out. I make the miserable and endless trek up the stairs to her room, pounding on the door, but she doesn’t answer. I consider breaking down the door, but some inexplicable sense tells me she isn’t there, so I walk back down to the greenhouse. She isn’t there either. I have no choice but to return to the apartment and enlist the help of Silene and Fionn. As I walk through the door, my mind races over how to explain to them IknowLaurel is my mate, when such a thing isn’t supposed to be real.

They’re seated at the dining table, playing a game of Skran. Silene looks up at me, then does a double take. “Went that bad?”

My mouth goes dry.Where do I even begin?“You could say that,” I start slowly. “There’s something I have to tell you, and I need you to believe me.Pleasebelieve me.” The words are a plea, full of emotion I don’t know how to express. Silene’s brow furrows, and Fionn raises an eyebrow. They set down their cards, waiting for me to continue. “Laurel—she wanted to spar after I told her about Nemesia. I guess she just needed to get the frustration out, or lock it away, I’m not sure.”

“Makes sense,” Fionn murmurs, and Silene gives him a look that tells him not to interrupt again.

“We were going all out. She was ferocious and—andbrilliant, making all the right moves. So, I pushed harder. But then she tired, and I accidentally sliced her arm. And when she bled…” I take a deep breath. “When she bled, and the scent hit me, I had thisknowingwash over me. Laurel is, we’re—Laurel is my mate,” I finally finish in a furious rush of words. They both stare at me, confused. “I swear it’s the truth. We both felt it, bothknewwhat it meant,” I explain, a silent plea in my shaking voice.

“Okay…” Silene says slowly. “And Laurel felt this too?” Her expression is one of studious caution, while Fionn just looks worried.

“Yes. I pushed her to draw my blood too.” I let out a chuff remembering how easy it had been to work Laurel up to fight me. That same satisfaction I’ve felt from the very beginning every time I can get under her skin washes over me briefly before I shut it away and focus on finding her. “And as soon as she scented my blood, she knew.” Fionn now looks suspicious, while Silene’s expression has shifted to unreadable.

“And where is she now?” Silene asks.

“I don’t know!” I growl. “She aerstepped away. She thinks we’re really engaged, even though I’ve told her we don’t want it.” Silene’s jaw drops open, but she lets me continue. “She said she couldn’t take away your chance to beQueen, as if you’re interested in that at all. And she said—” I deflate thinking about those final words she uttered. As much as I want this, as much as it makes complete sense and like everything in my life has finallyclicked, she’s right. I’m still her enemy’s son, and this would give him one more thing over her. “She said she doesn’t want to let my father have this connection to her. Another way to make her vulnerable. Then she left.” I’m shaking now, with need or fear or anger, I’m not sure.

“She’ll come back. Just give her time,” Silene says quietly, rubbing my forearm in support. I yank it away from her.

“No!” I roar. “You don’t understand, Ineedto find her. I know this sounds unbelievable, but I can tell that she’s not okay. I think—I think she’s in danger. She needs me.” The last sentence is a whimper.

Silene and Fionn share a look, and Fionn tags in. “Thorne, brother, if she left, she probably needs some space. Probably needs to process whatever’s going on between you two.”

I growl again and stalk away. “If you won’t help me, then I’ll figure something out myself.” I grab a cloak, resolved to walk outside in the freezing temperatures until I find her.

“Wait,” Silene calls. “Of course we’ll help. Just, take a minute. Let’s go over what we know. We need a plan.” I reluctantly stalk back to the table and sit down, putting my head in my hands.

“You’re not yourself, Thorne,” Fionn says suspiciously. “Are you sure…” he hesitates, like even he doesn’t want to say his next words. “Are you sure this isn’t somemagicby Laurel?” He whispers, like he’s afraid of the very idea.

Ire builds in me, and I erupt. “How dare you! After all we’ve seen from Laurel, you still believe her capable of witchcraft?” Light curls in my palms, and I’m about to launch myself at Fionn when there’s a faint scratching noise coming from my room. We all turn toward the sound.

Realization washes over me as I remember my previous visitor, and I run into my room and open the door for the black feline, who rushes into the sitting room. Silene shrieks and Fionn hisses. I wave them back, then look at the creature. Her eyes convey fear, and she’s agitated. She paces back and forth, and if I wasn’t sure that Laurel is in trouble before, I am now.

“How do I help her?” I ask the beast, searching her golden eyes. She stalks toward Silene, then stands at her side, looking back and forth between us. “I don’t understand,” I tell the feline.

“I do!” Silene yells excitedly. “She means me. I can aerstep you to her. We just need to sneak into Laurel’s room and snatch more elixir.”

“But I don’t know where she is!” I huff out in a frustrated grunt, desperation threatening to take over. Silene’s brows furrow for a moment in thought.