Page 106 of A Game of Monsters

“Care to further that statement?”

He lifted his silver eyes over my shoulder and laid them on Duncan’s shell. “I realised that Duncan never planned toshareyou. That wasn’t what he meant.”

“Because he thought he was dying?”

Erix shook his head, fixing his gaze back to mine. “No. His offer was not solely born from a place of worry that he was going to be taken from you. It was made from the hope that, if given another chance, he simply wishes for the man he loves to be happy. To be whole. At least, those were his words.”

I did want those things. But the same went for Erix. If it was Erix in Duncan’s shoes, taking his path, I would have reacted the same. I knew that. The fear I harboured at the idea of losing either of them made me sick to my core.

“Duncan knows me well,” I said, finding that it was all I could get out. “As well as his own desires. However, this decision must be made with equal power between not two, but three of us. Tell me, Erix, what is it you want? Because if Duncan survives this, we are once again faced with this tug and pull. I love you, and I love Duncan, but I don’t want to be stretched between you.”

“Why choose, hey?” Erix took a step closer until my chest pressed into his.

“Surely it isn’t as simple as that?”

Erix drank me in, all silver eyes full of love, and lips glistening from the trace of his tongue. “We would not be the first in history to fall in love outside the norms of what society dictates. Sometimes love is not as clear cut as we believe it to be. It is as wild as a ravine, and as embracing as the waters within it. So, I ask you, what do you want, little bird?”

I took a deep breath, filling my body with the incense-heavy air of Irobel. “I want to exist between you both comfortably, like a piece of a puzzle finally finding the place it belongs. But that will only work if you are both matching pairs.”

His eyes narrowed, the tension growing thicker between us. “Then it seems our desires are shared. I told you long ago that it is my duty to ensure you are cared for,” Erix added, a single brow lifting over inquisitive eyes. Tired, inquisitive eyes that were haunted by everything we’d been through. “That duty is the same for Duncan. And truthfully, I care deeply for him. On a level I never knew possible. My love for Duncan stems fromhislove for you. And I understand now, after my conversation with him, those feelings are mutual.”

I longed to touch him, to trace my fingers along his jaw and memorise him for an eternity. “It’s as if life finally makes sense, right?”

“My thoughts exactly.”

I found my gaze drifting to where Duncan lingered inside the strange pod. “When Duncan wakes from this, I will still need you. I can’t explain it in words, not yet. However, I know Duncan is right. I’m only whole when the two halves of my heart are kept together. He holds one half, and you the other.”

Erix shuffled on his feet, turning his body to the side until we both looked to where Duncan rested.

Moonlight swept in through the glassless windows, bathing his profile in an iridescent glow. It caught the single tear that slipped out of his eye, which was strange, because Erix looked the happiest I’d seen him in a long time.

“Are you crying because you are sad?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

He shook his head, lips tugging wider. “Robin, I thought I lost you. I grieved for you after… after what Doran made me do. I accepted my actions and the consequences they led to, and it destroyed me. But it was Duncan who encouraged you to speak to me in Berrow all that time ago. It was Duncan who ensured I stuck around. For you. He recognised, even then, that you needed me, even if neither of us had worked that out. I owe him my life for that.”

I didn’t understand the concept of being with them both, but what I did know was it involved consent. If all parties were not on equal footing, then it would fail before it began.

It was my turn to offer Erix some comfort, for his words sank as deep as a knife inside of me. I lifted my hand up and laid it on his cheek. Erix closed his eyes, his expression soft with relief. He leaned into my touch, quickly covering my hand and holding it in place.

“I never stopped loving you, Erix,” I whispered my admission. “Just as I know I’ll never stop loving Duncan. My heart is big enough for the both of you, equally. I see it now… that it is not about separate halves or sharing. It just simplyis.”

“You have no idea how I have needed to hear that, little bird,” Erix smiled, the emotion glittering in twin silver-flamed eyes. “No idea.”

“Then hear it, and take it in,” I said. “Don’t ever forget.”

“I will not, even though I still recognise I’m not worthy of such an answer, not after the pain I have caused you, but I dohearyou.”

“Who determines if you are not worthy of my love, but me?” I asked.

The pause stretched between us, a gaping mouth of darkness ready to swallow us up for judgement.

“Perhaps we can continue this conversation when Duncan decides to wake up?” Erix said, putting a halt to the conversation. “I want him to hear my definitive answer. It would be pointless if he wakes and has changedhismind, now he knows that death is behind him.”

“I told you already, Duncan is a man of his word.”

Erix lifted his eyes toward the hanging sack that Duncan dwelled within. “We shall see.”

Then he stepped back, leaving my hand to hover strangely in the air where he’d been. His gaze swept the room, searching for something. “I think it best that we both get some rest. Duncan would also kill me if he knew you hadn’t slept properly whilst in my care.”

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