Page 92 of A Game of Monsters

My cheeks bloomed with heat, knowing that the dreams I’d had, had potentially been shared with Erix.

“What are you suggesting, Duncan?” Erix asked, voice calm although his face was pinched, revealing his internal struggle.

“Boundaries. But the way forwards is not for me to come up with alone. It is not only Robin’s desires that matter, but ours also. We must all be on the same page. Up until now I simply laid out the possibility of a path, but without the consent of all parties, what is possible will be meaningless. We can walk out this door knowing we tried, that’s what matters.”

I fixed my eyes on an unimportant place upon the floor. This conversation, although breathtaking, was almost ill-placed. After everything that had happened, I couldn’t help but feel as if this could’ve waited. But Duncan spearheaded it, and it had to be for a reason.

One I was far too frightened to accept yet.

“I have so much I want to say, but I don’t know where to start,” I said.

“Then say it all, Robin. I need to hear the words come from you.” There was a pleading edge to Erix’s tone. “Tell us what you want.”

“I don’t know,” I said, finding lying easier.

“Yes, you do,” Duncan replied. “I’m not telling you how to react, nor am I asking you to provide me with an answer right now if you are not ready to give it.” Duncan paused, taking a hulking breath in, as though what he had to say next required it. “But I am suggesting an option for us all. One where the three of us can be… one.”

Erix stood abruptly. His fingers pinched the bridge of his nose, his eyes screwed shut. I jolted up to reach for him, but it was too late. My right hand felt empty without him, as if a physical piece of me had suddenly been taken away.

“I fear I have pushed this too quickly,” Duncan said, leaning back, eyes blinking closed.

“I should go and help… they might need me.” Erix reached the door in four large strides.

“Erix,” I called after him.

Duncan pulled me back. “Let him go. Choice is important, he deserves to make his own when he is ready. As do you.”

I tugged free of Duncan’s hand, only to regret it when he grunted in pain. I was literally stuck between them both, unsure if I should go after Erix, or help Duncan as he suffered.

“Erix, please,” I begged, just as he took a step outside the door.

“Little bird, I am not walking away from you, or Duncan.” He stopped, long enough to look back at me. “I just need some fresh air. Time to think. Today has been… a lot.”

How could I refuse that? In what realm did I have the justification to tell Erix how to feel or how to react?

“Will you come back?” I asked, voice cracking with hopefulness. “I don’t… I can’t lose you too.”

In a manner of speaking, I had just told Erix what I wanted. Him. Duncan. Both of them. A tomorrow when we could all be as one. Even if that tomorrow was under threat every second that passed.

It was impossible to keep Althea’s capture from my head. It sprung out of the shadows, like an assassin, ready to slay me with the reality that she was gone. Losing her reminded me what was important in life.

Erix bit down on his lower lip, contemplating my request. “That’s the problem, little bird. I’m strong enough to know that I couldneverleave you for long.” He settled silver-clad eyes on Duncan and added. “Nor you, Duncan.”

Then, with that, Erix left us.

The door swung shut behind him, leaving me to simmer in the possibilities. I stood there, rooted to the spot, staring at the door as if Erix would come barrelling through it again.

When he didn’t, I released a heavy sigh and faced Duncan again. His posture had slumped further, as if the last dregs of adrenaline had left in the wake of Erix’s departure. All thoughts of the conversation faded as I saw the obvious discomfort he was in. In seconds, I was on my knees before him.

“Why are you doing this, Duncan?” I grappled for his hands, noticing how he didn’t have the strength left to hold me back. “It is your turn to tell me the truth.”

“Because… I never ever want… you to be alone in this life.”

“But I would have you,” I choked. “You’d forgive me for my transgressions, and be with me?”

Duncan closed his eyes. “I hope so, if I can hold out that long.”

Panic surged through me, blinding any hope of saying anything else about the matter of me, Duncan and Erix.

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