Page 13 of Until My Last Breath

Richard observed Elizabeth’s changed countenance with great distress. As much as he desperately wanted to clarify the story, he could not go against her wishes and remained silent until they arrived at her friend’s house. There, without even a small glance, she quickly thanked him and entered the house.

Back at Rosings Park, Richard realised he would not be able to talk to Darcy as he was still out, busy with Mr Grant. He only hoped he could talk to him before dinner.

Alas, Richard did not have the opportunity. When Darcy excused himself from the gathering, Richard knew exactly where his cousin was going — and what was waiting for him. He only had time to shake his head and mouth ‘no’.

To no avail.

Without a second glance, Darcy was gone.

~ ♥ ~

By dinner time, as Elizabeth’s disposition had only worsened, she was allowed to miss the gathering at Rosings. She retired earlier to her bedchamber, and after a long time crying over her newly found disappointment, she was finally sleeping.

There was a knock on the door, and a small head peeked inside. “Miss,” the maid called, entering the room. “Mr Darcy is downstairs asking to see you. I don’t think I can send ’im away, Miss. Could you please come down?”

Elizabeth was surprised. She dismissed the maid with the assurance she would go down as soon as possible. But she did not hurry. She did not wish to see the man, not after what had been confirmed about his character, and certainly not as she was at that moment. Her eyes were puffy, her facered, and her head throbbing. But her greater pain was for her broken heart. She felt demeaned by the reminder that Mr Darcy, a man whose company she was beginning to appreciate, even desire, thought so badly of her and her family. He considered them beneath him. Despite their respectful position in the local community, her family lacked propriety and was not even worthy of his friend’s affection.

Her last impression of him, before their re-encounter, had been the correct one after all.

When she finally managed to make herself presentable enough, she went downstairs, praying to be able to keep her temper.

She found Mr Darcy in the drawing room, pacing from one end to the other. Pausing to see his agitation, her heart only hardened.You can go and hang yourself, Mr Darcy. I do not care.

“Mr Darcy,” she called, swallowing her anger. He was so absorbed in his own thoughts that he did not notice when she quietly closed the door after her. “I am sorry to make you wait for so long, but as I was not expecting any visitors, I was already in bed, sleeping.”

She did not need to continue. The effect of her cold words made Darcy swallow hard.

He seemed to hesitate, then looked straight into her eyes. “I am sorry to have disturbed you at this time, Miss Elizabeth, but I could not rest before making sure you were well. Please forgive me. I hope you are feeling better.”

The warmth of his eyes and manner made Elizabeth uncomfortable. “I thank you for your concern, but at the moment I am feeling… very bad.” She did not care that she was being rude. She only hoped her honest reply would be enough to make him leave.

She wanted him gone. Forever.

But instead of leaving, he gently took her hands and helped her to sit, dragging another chair for himself closer to her.

“Miss Elizabeth, I was worried that your sudden illness was, in some way, a result of my… absence this morning.”

She gasped, but did not dare say anything, hoping he would find away to explain such an assertion.

Her temper was starting to boil.

“I know we have been meeting in the morning when we go for our walks,” Darcy continued hesitantly, “and after yesterday, we… um…”

He looked down at his hands and shook his head. He stood up and went to the window. “I cannot even dare to imagine what you might be thinking of me,” he said, distressed. He turned to her and added in almost a whisper, “I would have come to you, but I was detained by Mr Grant and had no way to let you know.”

She frowned, her discomfort escalating with his unexpected, kind words and consideration.

He resumed his pacing around the room before stopping and looking at her again. For some reason, her pained countenance, even her silence, seemed to be enough encouragement for him to continue.

He knelt down in front of her and took her hands again, looking at them. She flinched but did not oppose. “I have given much consideration to our… relationship, and I would like to tell you…” He raised his face, caressing her with his eyes. “I love you, Elizabeth. You do not need to worry—”

She gasped and pulled one of her hands to her mouth. Her pained expression softened, then turned into one of incredulity.

He seemed gratified by her reaction and exhaled. “I know the situation of our families is quite different. And I know of my duty to marry someone with more distinguished origins—”

She stood up, and walked to the other side of the room, suddenly torn apart by the cruelty fate had reserved for her. For a fraction of a second, she thought she could overlook the displeasure she felt for him.

He loves me!

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