Page 116 of Get Me to the Starting Line

The realization dawns on me, emotion flooding every inch of my body and I almost collapse. But I can’t yet, not until I cross that finish line. The finish line that felt so out of reach. That felt so far away I couldn’t picture it.

And there it is.

When I see Isabel’s sign, I laugh hysterically. “If it was easy, I would do it!”

And then I see Paige’s sign. Tears spill over and run down my salty, crusted cheeks. Proof I hydrated properly for this race.

A different kind of emotion washes over me, like a caress on my cheek from the wind, and as I take in all the love and support, I feel my mom’s presence. I feel her pride in the woman I’ve become, and with that surge of energy, that last push from my mother’s love, I run.

I don’t hear the sound of the race director announcing my name, ushering me across as the last runner. I’m so surprised to seeso many spectators still around. I thought for sure it would only be the volunteers and my friends, but there’s a crowd of people clapping and cheering.

My eyes are blurry but I see Paige’s proud face, tears streaming down her cheeks as she screams and cheers me on, her smile so wide I fear her face might split. Adam’s face mirrors Paige’s. He’s crying too.

Each of my friends is cheering for me and I realize I was never doing this alone. I couldn’t have done this alone. I needed these people to help me cross that finish line. I needed them to even get me to the starting line.

But they don’t need me. A sob heaves through my body as I crash into Paige’s open arms. She doesn’t need me.

Shewantsme.

And that’s so much better.

From over Paige’s shoulder, I zone in on Julien. From the way his chest is heaving, he must’ve hauled ass to give me this moment. There’s no way to describe this feeling, besides an overwhelming amount of shock and pride. I did it.

I crossed the finish line last.

ThethingLeahwaslooking forward to the most today was the meal after the race. And she fucking deserved every bite of her breakfastandlunch. I think I fell even harder for her when I saw how much food she could fit in her tiny body.

It was seriously impressive. And despite all of us being tired and sweaty, we were riding that runner’s high so much that none of us cared. Not even me. I forgot how different the high is with a group of people versus as a solo runner.

That was the last time I’ve seen Leah today. When we got back to the hotel, everyone went their separate ways to clean up and rest before meeting for a late dinner. Now, we’re sitting in this eclectic restaurant Leah chose, and she’s not even here.

Paige said she was exhausted and decided to stay in and rest. She assured me Leah had all the ice packs she needed and was absolutely wiped and needed some alone time.

Even though I understand, it doesn’t stop me from worrying about her all day. I even go so faras to text her.

Leah Harrison

you okay?

It goes unanswered. Right as I’m about to order a to-go box to take some food to her, Paige says Leah texted her a picture of her room service. I’m glad to know she’s at least alive. But I bristle.

She didn’t answermytext.

do you need anything?

send signs of life

*middle finger emoji*

Even though her text makes me chuckle, something feels off. It’s not like her to ditch Paige, let alone stray from the sacred itinerary. Is she avoiding me?

are you upset with me?

It’s possible she’s up in her room cursing me out for suggesting we do this race in the first place. But how can she feel anything but accomplished right now? I saw her face when she finished—she was emotional but happy.

The smile on her face was brighter than the desert sun. Paige swarmed her, but I got a hug at the end too. Well, it was a group hug, but still, my arms were around her. Where they were meant to be.

And I know her well enough to know that completing the race was overwhelming, in a life changing kind of way.

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