Page 36 of Never Left You

I can’t do this alone anymore. I miss him so much. I can’t keep pretending I’m ok.

Swallowing, I typed out a new message.

Me

Same number? Mine’s the same too…See you tomorrow, Cash.

P.S. I won’t admit it out loud, but I’m enjoying you being here. Thank you for tonight.

Twelve

Cash

SixYearsAgo

Storming out of the Hartwells’ house was not how I expected to end my evening. I don’t think I had ever been this furious at my wife. We had some fights in the past—many, if I was being honest—but with how she just blew up in front of Abi and Sylas, screaming so loud that Stetson woke up, she even shook me to my core.

And all over nothing.

I gripped the railing and hunched my shoulders, willing the pounding in my head to slow. Closing my eyes, I forced air toswell in my lungs. Inhale. Exhale. Deep breaths. Over and over. In and out. They told you to breathe, right? The professionals said breathe. But then again, the professionals never had to deal with Carolyn.

“Hey, you ok?”

Abi’s calm voice filled the air, and immediately the pounding lessened. No matter what, she could always take the chaos and turn it calm. Opening my eyes into the darkness, I gave her a curt nod.

She scoffed, calling my bluff. “No you’re not.”

“How’s Stet?” I questioned, deflecting the conversation.

“Sylas went to check on him.” She pushed against the railing, crossing her ankles in front of her.

“Divided and conquered who would take care of who huh?” I quipped, sounding more irritated than I should have.

“Well, when Carolyn stormed into the bathroom and knocked a photo off the wall when she slammed the door. We both just took off where we were needed. And I was needed here. Plus, Stetson literally screamed for Dad.” She shifted her body to give me a bump, my entire frame moving slightly.

“Ah, so I was second choice,” I joked, trying to bring light to the situation.

“You are not, and you know it.” She gave my shoulder a light punch. “So…honestly this time. You ok?”

I shook my head. “I’m sorry. We’ve been fighting more than usual. I just hoped we could make it through one night.”

“Fights happen, though I’m confused as to why she was acting the way she was.”

I tried to play the night back in my head, starting with Carolyn promising me it would be a good evening. She didn’t particularly like Sylas and Abi, but when they invited us over to dinner, I begged her to come. Being with this family made me feel like myself. Smiles came easily here. We got there early, Igave Abi a hug, Sylas got a pat on the back, and I scooped Stetson up in my arms. When Abi disappeared to put Stetson down, Carolyn loosened up slightly, even cracking a few smiles when Sylas told a joke. Once Abi came back, Carolyn made sure to be at my side the entire time, her hand slinking up my shirt, her long nails scratching into my skin.

I wasn’t one to mind a little PDA, but when it turned into something more and Carolyn whispering that we sneak off, that was a little too much for me. When I asked her to stop, her switch flipped.

“Of course you would prefer to stay here. Of course I don’t come first for you.”

Her screams were so loud, so over the top, that I couldn’t help but defend myself.

“You know you come first.”

“You’re different here. You’re not the Cash I married.

“You’rethe one acting different. You’re the one touching me as if we were alone, suggesting we go up to their room. Come on Carolyn, have some respect.”

“Youhave some respect. Maybe show yourwifeyou actually love her instead of—”

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