Page 119 of The Vigilant

I shivered, his voice taking a tone I hadn’t heard before. “Tynan?—”

“Whatever he knows,” Tynan cut me off. “He won’t be sharing until he’s conscious again.”

Right. Creed had hit him pretty hard. Still, he could wake up at any moment.

“Off the table.”

Gritting my teeth, I slid my feet to the ground. “I want to wait?—”

“And I want to erase the image in my mind of a gun being pointed at your head today,” he seethed, his anger only fueling mine.

I glared at him, the seconds stretching long before I stalked from the room and headed for the elevator. I was angry, my anger spilling out through filters of petulance and defiance, but I couldn’t care.

Mara wasn’t there.

I hadn’t saved her. Just like I hadn’t been able to save Dad. Or Mom.

I wasn’t enough for anyone, and at some point, what if I wasn’t enough for Tynan either?

I told myself it was anger that blurred my vision in the elevator. Anger that he stood next to me, so calm. So stoic. So sure that I’d just capitulate to him.

“I’m going to take a shower,” I declared as soon as we entered the cabin, beelining for the bedroom like I didn’t hear the heavy thud of his footsteps stalking after me.

“No, you’re not,” he rumbled low.

Fuck this.

Fuck him.

Fuck me.

I whipped around and threw my jacket on the floor. “Yes. I. Am.” I felt wild. Unhinged. Pain driving every word. Every movement. Every breath.

His jaw pulsed. One hand slid to his waist and undid his belt buckle, and I cursed my body for the traitorous way my pussy clenched at the dangerously sexy sight.

“Get on the bed, Sutton.”

“I don’t want your punishment.”Liar.“Not after this. Not after today.” My breath hitched, feeling myself start to fracture. The pain in my chest wedged like a knife I couldn’t remove.

“Sutton…” He stepped closer to me, his voice still impossibly hard—unbreakable—but coated in a softness I felt as surely as velvet against my skin.

I shook my head like that was all it would take for him to leave me in my misery.

“She wasn’t there. They still have her.” I spat the words, bloody and broken from my chest. “She’s still in danger because of me. Don’t you think that’s punishment enough?”

A cry escaped after my outburst, and I pressed my hand to my chest like I could physically hold back everything else inside me.

“No,” Tynan growled and took my arm.

In an instant, I freed my knife and held it to the corner of his neck, his veins pulsing into the blade.

“Don’t,” I warned, panting hard, all of my skin feeling like it crackled with electricity.

His eyes flashed, but he didn’t balk. Of course, he didn’t. I hated that he knew I wouldn’t hurt him. I could never.

“Put the knife down, Sutton.”

My throat tightened, the twist of a sob trying to drill its way out of my chest, but I wouldn’t let it. I couldn’t. I had to be strong.

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