Page 37 of Rising

Ultimately, now that I was back, I had a final say in the matter. The only option in my mind was to do what felt right. What my gut said needed to be done.

I gave Riley permission to send out his men. He straightened, hiding his emotions behind a sniffle. Though he had been the one to make this request, we both knew he was now faced with the possibility of sending another friend to their death.

Taking a seat on the edge of my desk, I looked him over. “After you debrief your team, you need to take the day off.”

“What? No.” He rarely protested anything I asked of him.

But I wasn’t asking, I was telling. Seeing the state my friends were in was wearing on me. Nothing about them showed that they were okay, and while I had let the world crumble around me, they had carried my weight. He could take one day to focus on himself and the losses he had faced. I wouldn’t interfere after that.

“Yes. I’m … I’m sorry Ri. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you after Jax, and I’m sorry I wasn’t here to stop this from happening. I’m sorry I let you down. I’m ... I’m sorry you lost someone else. If you won’t do this for yourself, then please, do this for me. Take some time.” I hated myself for a moment, guilt tripping him. But I knew that would be the only way he’d listen, if he thought it was helping me. I wished he would want to help himself for once. So desperately I wanted my friend to feel that he rightfully owned a place in this world. He wasn’t disposable. Not to me, not to anyone here.

“Okay,” he agreed.

“I’ll come with you to talk to his girlfriend about the funeral and headstone.”

“No. It’s fine,” he insisted. “I don’t think she’d be open to any otherguests.”

We both knew he meant me. That she blamed my absence. The way he said guests was clear enough, a kind way to tell me I shouldn’t stop by anytime soon either.

I blinked back my emotions and offered my friend a reassuring smile. “And I bet you’re on headstone duty?”

Knowing though he didn’t go around displaying his earth magic arts and crafts, he was quite talented. His carvings and sculptures outlining his room in the General Living Quarter.

“I am.” His head held high as he walked towards me to squeeze my arm. “I’m glad you’re back. I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah, hopefully not till tomorrow,” I shouted at his back as he left, moving across the floor without a sound.

I glanced at the clock on the bookshelf to my right and threw my head back.How is the day flying by yet dragging on at the same time?10 a.m. I had a few minutes to spare before the next sparring sessions took place in The Ring and decided to take a peek into my sleeping quarters, not sure if Tomoe had awoken yet. She was usually up before the sky, but her injuries from the day before had taken a toll.

The couch in my room was empty, littered with whatever breakfast Reina had probably brought her. I reminded myself to pinch her when I next saw her for the mess. My stomach growled, remembering I hadn’t yet eaten breakfast.

That was going to have to wait until after I checked in on the training, which meant basically lunch.Urgh.The rest of my morning went as expected. I watched my soldiers spar for a couple of hours and made corrections where I saw fit.

For the most part, their form was still immaculate and their endurance hadn’t faded. Their morning runs had been a contention point between Seth and I in the past. He and his crew had seen how easy it was for Pansies to keep up with their horses if they were freshly fed. It was a fair point, but they’d never learn to out maneuver the undead if they just took a jog through The Compound. It was a harsh reality, but I expected my soldiers to be able to hold their own outside these gates, otherwise who was to say they were capable of defending what lay within them?

Once enough time had passed without a single newborn born of the zombie gene most of what was left of the human race felt we would stand a chance. That eventually they’d all die or be killed off and we can truly start over, but that simply hadn’t been the case. Either ashit tonof people died in the first few months or there were a lot more of those assholes out there than we initially estimated.

There was no real way to determine how many people turned. Without an accurate census, there never would be. Hell, we didn’t even have a clue what was going on outside the territories on the continental US.

No one had heard a word from overseas since the last time cell phone reception flickered back on all those years ago. Through the San Diego Compound, we knew they had been in communication with people over the border, so life went on there. I knew from the call Sammy had with her parents that someof Canada had survived the initial blasts, but the Seattle and Spokane Compounds had also made contact with a few stragglers from the other side of the border as well.

As for Alaska, Hawaii, overseas and beyond, no one here knew. At least no one in our allied territories did either, but I assume that a lot of humanity is still trying to get it together out there. I remain hopeful about that.

We were lucky here, to have good enough leadership at different settlements during the last civil war. A small kernel of humanity had remained in this country that prevented more chaos and allowed us to regroup. Even so, many didn’t live the way we did here at the Monterey Compound. This was a place built by dreamers, people that wanted to rebuild betterthan things were before, and not fall back into the same.

But life was still hard, and dangerous, even with magic. We didn’t have the luxury to pretend hell hadn’t happened and stained our souls. Like we all didn’t do terrible things we never thought we’d have to do to get to this point, but future generations could if we set them up right. And that’s what this place was, a new tomorrow. A better tomorrow.

I tried to remember that as I made my rounds touching base with the families of the lost, though my words probably seemed empty to them, I meant every word. I was sorry that this had happened, but their deaths wouldn’t go unavenged. I promised to figure out how this had happened,whythis had happened. To end whoever made this happen.

Amaia

Isat at our usual lunch table alone, wondering when my friends would arrive, letting myself get lost in my thoughts and running through the checklist of what I had left to do with my day. Each task felt as if it had dragged on for hours, just for me to check the time and see only thirty minutes had passed.

Pushing the food on my plate side to side, I poked at my large plate of green bean casserole. I wasn’t starving, but was forcing myself to eat. Getting my strength back as quickly as possible was now essential if I wanted to be an effective leader in whatever came next.

Just as I’d given up hope, Reina walked in, her dark red lips pulled into a smile and delight filled her eyes. Despite the events of yesterday, she looked well rested and put together. Her long brown hair fell down her back, wispy strands hung in her face. She wore tight fitting black cargo pants tucked into her Doc Martens and a tan tank top that displayed a good portion of her stomach.

“Maia!” she exclaimed. “Urgh, I’ve literally missed you so much. I wasn’t sure you’d come back so soon after last night. Boy, last night wasawful. Well, I guess not as awful as your night. Riley and Moe slumbered in your room and all. For quiet people, they both snore like bears. Anyway, Jessa conned her way into sleeping over, said she was ‘scared. Guess I kinda like her, but still, a girl has boundaries,’” I let my friend ramble off about her latest woman of the month, taking comfort in the normality of it all. Thankful I had at least one friend that could pick up where we left off months ago.

---