Page 102 of Play Dirty

I can’t be the reason he doesn’t have them.

Ugh.

It’s like a vicious circle in my brain, coming back to the same things over and over. It needs to stop before I drive myself insane.

I love him, truly, but we can’t have everything we want in life.

I’ve learned that lesson the hard way.

One thing I thought of on the flight, however, was something I’ve never considered before: Adoption.

Not now.

I’m still too raw from the traumas of my past, but in a few years, once I’m past the worst of it, I might consider it. There are so many children who aren’t wanted, in foster care, who need homes. And I could provide a good one.

When the time is right, I’ll be a good mom.

At least, I’ll try my best.

There has to be a kid out there who needs my love.

I haven’t worked out any logistics of what, when, or where, but I will.

I have time. I’m only twenty-seven, and despite thinking that it’s time to slow down, maybe it’s not.

If I can spend the next few years focusing on my career—making money and investing it wisely—I could retire and not have to worry about money ever again. I would still do something, and though I’m not sure what, I have time to figure it out.

The canvas of my life is blank again.

All I can do now is start painting a new future.

A future without Marty.

I just didn’t realize how much this would hurt.

Chapter33

Marty

“…frivolouswaste of the court’s time and my client’s money.”

“I tend to agree.” The judge looks annoyed. “I’m declining the request for a temporary restraining order. I’ll see you all at the hearing in two weeks.”

Madeline smiles.

She’s a tiny pixie of a woman, with short dark hair and big dark eyes.

But she’s shrewd as hell and a veritable force of nature.

I’ve never seen anything like it.

I don’t want to think about how much this twenty minutes of her time cost me, but it’s worth every penny.

The look on Brenna’s face makes me want to laugh.

I don’t, but I want to.

I’m still so fucking pissed off at her.