Page 30 of Play Dirty

“…and then she took us on the Ferris wheel…it was so high!” He’s quiet for a moment, listening. “No, I wasn’t scared. Auntie Stevie held my hand...no, Daddy’s tummy hurts on the fast rides. So he stayed with Emma and Bradley…I don’t know… no, Auntie Stevie went to her house… I don’tknow, Mommy.” He sounds a little frustrated now.

“Okay, buddy, it’s pool time,” I say gently. “Say goodbye to Mommy and go put your bathing suit on.”

“Bye, Mommy! I love you too!” He thrusts the phone at me and then goes running out of the room even though this is where his bathing suit is.

“Who’s Auntie Stevie?” Brenna demands.

“Stevie is a friend of Ivan and Chey’s,” I say. “I’m sure you met her.”

“The supermodel?” She snorts. “Is that who you’re fucking now?”

“No,” I say patiently, reminding myself I want custody of these kids. “She’s a friend. A group of us went to the carnival. You know I can’t do the rides, and Martin loves them.”

She’s quiet for a moment. “Still? Dude, you’re going to have to man up for your kids.”

Man up?

Like my whacky inner ear that causes my motion sickness is something I can control by being… more manly?

“Okay, so we’ll call you tonight before bed?”

She pauses. “No, we’ll be on a plane. Philippe and I are going to Europe for a week.”

Now I understand. She didn’t care about missing last night’s call; she just wanted to talk to them before she left the country.

That figures.

“So bedtime for them will be morning for you over there.”

She hesitates again. “Unless we sleep in.”

“That’s fine. You call whenever you have a chance. Take care, Brenna.” I disconnect and let out a relieved breath.

She’ll be out of the country and difficult to reach.

So no nightly phone calls to worry about.

No stressful conversations.

No contact at all.

That feels like a bonus.

Hopefully, the kids won’t miss her too much.

* * *

I spendthe next week trying to find some semblance of a new normal. If I do win custody, this is a taste of what it will be like. Except it’s the off-season, so no hockey. I really need to start interviewing nannies. I just don’t know what to tell them. I can’t hire someone and then fire her if I lose the court case. It’s a real catch-22 and I’m not sure what to do about it. My lawyer assures me the judge will understand, as long as I engage an agency who’s ready to have me start interviewing.

In the meantime, the new babysitter, whose name is Ireland, is a lifesaver.

She needs money between now and when she goes back to college, which is in two weeks, so she’s willing to come over any time I call. It gives me time to get my car washed, play some golf with the guys, and work out. I spend the rest of the time with the kids. By the pool. At the park. The movies. Making breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Bedtime. Bathtime. Reading to them. Playing games.

If I’m honest, I’m tired.

I didn’t underestimate how exhausting it would be, but I hadn’t considered the toll it would take on the rest of my life—because I don’t have one. Other than a couple of golf games and meeting Connor at the gym once, I haven’t seen anyone or talked to anyone or done much. Normally, we’d spend the off-season traveling and seeing our families. This year, I’m too busy trying to move forward without a wife.

My mom is coming next week for a visit, to see the kids and help me for a week or two, but I’m starting to worry. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to manage once hockey season starts. A nanny will have to stay with them twenty-four-seven when I go on road trips. I can be gone as long as two weeks sometimes, though it’s usually just a few days, so it will be a huge balancing act.

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